Communication 🆙

Under pressure, people tell us what we want to hear

The best and worst of each of us always comes under pressure. When we are under pressure we can lose our nerve and be overwhelmed by the weight of stress, but we can also overcome ourselves and give the best of ourselves.Regardless of what happens, we tend to think […]

Eyes never lie: poker face

When it comes to making important decisions, time is often of the essence. Let's take the case of poker: the player has to continually decide what his next step will be and to do so many times he tries to interpret the face of his opponents. Then it is really vital […]

How the size of a room and a desk make us more or less communicative

I had previously referred to how architecture affects our mind and now I would like to bring to your attention a very interesting study which suggests that people feel more comfortable talking about their personal problems in large rooms furnished with desks. large, […]

Ignoratio lists or, as others deceive you

Ignoratio Lista, also known as a red herring fallacy in Anglo-Saxon countries, occurs when a person introduces information that is irrelevant to the topic of discussion. In this way he manages to divert the attention of all those involved reaching a conclusion […]

5 tips to be successful in a job interview

Are you looking for a job? Have you had dozens of interviews but no one has called you yet? Your resume is original and flawless but things are not going as you would like? Maybe it's not all down to the economic downturn, maybe you're making some basic mistakes […]

The 5 secrets of Buddhism to criticize in a positive way

"The criticism will not be pleasant, but it is necessary," said Winston Churchill. Timely criticism can avoid greater evils and plant the seed for enriching change. But criticism born of ignorance, envy or hatred can cause wounds that take a long time to heal.Buddhist […]

People full of themselves, because they annoy us so much

In life, we sometimes deal with people full of themselves. Deeply self-centered people who consume our resources and mental energy. Dealing with them is exhausting. The conversation quickly turns into a monologue that revolves around the other. When we finally […]

What is the secret of charismatic people?

A second and a half is not a particularly long time, in everyday life it passes in the blink of an eye. But when it comes to social interactions, a second and a half becomes a very long time and can make a substantial difference.In fact, it is likely that on more […]

Double Bind Theory: Trapped by those we love most

"I want you to do what you want, but don't do it because I told you." These words hide a deception. We all know. In fact, it is likely that on more than one occasion you have heard them from your parents or partner. Or maybe you have uttered them yourself on occasion […]

Convincing Stories: What makes them stand out?

A compelling story can persuade a sworn to a trial, he can help sell a product or he can take us away from embarrassment. But… you know what are the fundamental aspects that do yes that the story we tell is convincing? The psychologists Mazzocco and Green […]

3 things that criticizing others reveal about you

“We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are”, said the writer Anaïs Nin and psychology proves her right, especially when it comes to criticizing others. We believe that our assessments are objective, but the truth is that behind every judgment […]

People who claim to be always right

There are people who claim to be always right. They want to win at all costs. And even if you dismantle their arguments one by one, they won't be convinced. It is as if their life depended on being right. And in a sense it is because they have built their identity […]

Nasty Effect: Why should online comments be moderated?

Last year closed by issuing a clear warning against comments posted in blogs, online newspapers and websites: the responsibility of these lies with the site owner. Indeed, the European Court of Human Rights condemned a Slovakian newspaper stating that it was responsible […]

Boomerang effect of messages against prejudice

Sometimes advertisers create ads and campaigns for marketing with the best intentions in the world but… the results are disastrous. In the past I had already referred, for example, to messages negatives used to persuade people not to smoke and like these caused […]

Pseudo-conflict: discussions by misunderstanding

Argue, defend your idea and get angry.You wonder how he can think so differently. You come back, stand up for your arguments, and get frustrated.You think your positions are irreconcilable.Until suddenly, usually, a third person says, "But you are saying the […]

Narcissistic Triangulation: Putting a third person against you

Does your partner continually compare you to the ex?Does a friend speak ill of you to exclude you from your circle of friends? Did your father / mother turn the rest of the family against you?If any of these situations are familiar to you, chances are you are […]

People don't change because we insist on criticizing them

Criticism is not always positive, there are criticisms that hide resentment, frustration and even envy. But there are other criticisms, constructive criticisms, which can help to grow or correct mistakes.However, for a criticism to be well received and produce […]

Lies and lies: 5 tips to identify them

Identify the Lies and lies it is a fairly widespread concern. Of course, among all there is no shortage of psychologists who have dedicated themselves to establishing parameters to identify them and those who have even concentrated their studies on our ability […]

Broken Promises, Improved Promises — How Do We React?

Keeping your promise is a positive quality we all appreciate, but doing better than we promised can be a waste of time, or at least that's what curious research conducted at the University of California states. to the delivery experiences of the Amazon giant. […]

Physical contact: The dark side of the pat on the back

A simple physical contact can be very convincing, even more so than a well-prepared speech. It is known that a light touch on the arm or shoulder can make us more receptive and pushes us to be more willing to help those we do not know. Therefore, in the literature […]

Mimicry in communication: when is it a mistake?

Until a few years ago, when we started making the early studies in the field of non-verbal communication, it was considered that when two people are engaged in a very engaging conversation, these tended to unconsciously imitate some of the movements that the other […]

Are the witnesses reliable? Maybe only 50% of them !?

This study illustrates, quite dramatically, a fairly common deception which is usually the object of memory: the suggestionabilità. The experiment, developed by the Iowa State University, shows a very simple design whose repercussions are immense in the field […]

The Scammer's Euphoria: Why Do People Deceive Others?

Cheating and deceiving is a behavior that society has always labeled as negative, so psychologists have always assumed that the person who behaves in this way feels remorse and a whole series of negative emotions that push him to take a more ethical.But now a new […]

10 signs someone is lying

How good are you at finding out if someone is lying to you? A study conducted by the University of California states that instinct is the best tool we have to discover a lie, an ancestral mechanism that works perfectly. However, we often fail because we use our […]

Sometimes, to be heard, you need to close your mouth

There is a time to speak and another to remain silent, a time to justify oneself and another to reflect, a time to claim our rights firmly and another to wait patiently. Talking continuously isn't always better. Sometimes, in order to be heard, we must learn to […]

Stop giving explanations to those who don't hear reasons

There are situations where we need to give explanations. There are other situations where it is not necessary. It's that simple! Knowing the difference will help you avoid unnecessary stress. It is not always necessary justify our decisions, behaviors, attitudes […]

The size of the smartphone determines your level of assertiveness

Smartphones are now part of our life. They allow us to keep constantly connected. However, few people are aware that these devices can also influence their decisions, attitudes and behaviors.A study conducted at Harvard University indicates that cell phone size […]

The lies show up on the face

A screen in a dark room. A student watches a horror movie full of mutilation and pain. You notice that it is visibly excited. At the end of the dramatic scenes, one appears on the screen orientation: “you have to describe the film as if I had seen a flower garden […]

Apologies: the effectiveness of apologizing

Excuses adequate can help us to remedy the effects of some errors, but it is certain that we often overestimate the power of the same. In Western society not practically a week goes by without a politician appearing in the media, a entrepreneur or someone from […]

Before criticizing, think about what this criticism says about you

The word "criticism", like many others we use every day, has strayed far from its original meaning. In fact, it comes from the Indo-European root "skribh", which originally meant to separate and discern. Later this word took on a different meaning, more related […]

Mimic language: how does it help us to understand the other?

The definition "Mimic language" refers, roughly, our ability to express what we feel through gestures. However, in addition to conscious mimic language (the one we use to make us understand by people who do not speak our language) there is also a mimic language […]

What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent it with your mouth

Some people make the mistake of making up with their mouth what they haven't seen with their eyes. That is, they spread rumors of which they are not certain that often end up creating confusion and discomfort. In fact, some gossip and rumors can cause misunderstanding, […]

Persuasion: the effect of the third person

How much are you influenced by advertising messages? Probably the answer will be "very little". The fact is that we normally think that each of us is less susceptible to advertising messages than the large mass. One of the most intriguing aspects of the psychology […]

5 reasons to learn to listen

Learning to listen is complicated. It's not as easy as it sounds, because it doesn't mean just hearing what others are saying, it involves separating ourselves from our stereotypes, emotionally opening up to the other person's experiences, and stopping judging […]

How to apologize effectively

Be it a person who tries to to apologize with his partner for having had an inappropriate behavior or a multinational apologizing for causing environmental pollution, it is certain that the underlying mechanism is always the same. Either way, psychology is curious […]

Assertiveness, the ten rights we often forget

The ever increasing complexity of the environment in which we live puts us under the most diverse difficulties. Perhaps the most complex problems are those that originate from interpersonal relationships and that require a great deal of assertiveness for a solution […]

7 signs that you are arguing unnecessarily

Speech is one of the most powerful tools at our disposal. Through it we can express what we feel and think, we are able to convince others and reach an agreement. Words can heal wounds, resolve conflicts and lead to mutual understanding.But words don't have magical […]

Saboteurs of happiness, people who oppress and exhaust

There are people who oppress and exhaust us. They devour our time and our energy. They are not at peace with themselves and try to wreak wars wherever they go, leaving behind a trail of malaise and frustration. Their attitudes and words put a strain on our emotional […]

Being more persuasive - how?

Being more persuasive is quite simple: just speak in the right ear of the interlocutor. Although this is a very outdated theory, new scientific data would help confirm it. A simple experiment: 176 women walked into a nightclub and approached several people asking […]

Persuasion techniques: the power of swearing

Le persuasion techniques are various, ea sometimes these depend on responses that come directly from the unconscious. For example, utter, perhaps shouting, cursing at the beginning or at the end of a speech can make our interlocutor accept what we wish to communicate. […]

3 unusual persuasion techniques

Convincing someone is not always easy, even if we use the most appropriate arguments. Persuasion is an exquisite mix of intuition and art, logic and emotion. To be convincing, we must first of all develop empathy; if we are not able to put ourselves in the place […]

Social Networks: why do we use them to share experiences?

People share stories, news and information with others. Before the internet existed this process took place with the word of mouth, verbal communication in the first person; the classic means in conclusion. Now that the social networks o social nets, e-mail, smartphones […]

Lies: Are They Discovered by Looking at the Eyes?

There is a popular proverb that states and the eyes are the mirror of the soul. Perhaps this is why many people believe that if you observe the eyes of while someone says something it will be possible to find out if he is lying or if he's telling the truth. In […]

5 tricks to grab the attention of the public

"The beginning is the most important part of the work," Plato said many centuries ago. The ability to surprise and capture the interest of the public is essential because, otherwise, regardless of whether the message to be conveyed is important, it will reach […]

Verbal manipulation: when he injures himself to control

Language is one of the most powerful tools we have. With words we can get closer, understand each other, ask for help, receive comfort ... But with words we can also distance ourselves, misinterpret, hurt each other ...Sometimes "words violate understanding, throw […]

How is the first impression formed?

Surely you have heard that it is important to make a good first impression or maybe it was you who told a friend. In fact, for people the first impression is very important because we know that starting from this first impact people form an idea of how we […]

Never fight a battle of wits with an unarmed person

"I refuse to fight a battle of intelligence with an unarmed person," said Mark Twain, a writer who went down in history for the clever irony he poured into his works and for the indomitable character that more resembled the "savage" Huck than to the "civilized" […]

Technological lies: cell phone versus email

La spread of the mobile phone it is a reality that has affected everyone, some more than others and much has been said about the harmful effects it could have on physical health; however, what do you think of the connections between mobile telephony and psychological […]

New truth test: how to deceive him?

One of the essential objectives of some governments and of the various judicial systems, and we add many psychologists, is to be able to determine more and more precisely when a person lies. For this purpose, the most curious and gruesome inventions have developed […]

How to apologize properly

Have you ever faced a person with the intention of apologizing and ended up getting angry, even bumping into each other hard? If this has happened to you, don't worry, you are not alone. I think that something similar has happened to everyone, at least once in […]

How to make constructive criticism?

Winston Churchill said that "criticism will not be pleasant, but it is necessary". However, criticizing is easy, constructive criticism is an art that few have mastered. To criticize in order to criticize can be extremely harmful. Constructive criticism, on the […]

Do you talk to your dog? A study shows that he understands you!

Have you ever made fun of someone because he was talking to his dog?You probably also thought it wasn't quite normal, after all, the animal may not have understood it. Anyway, all those who have a four-legged friend are convinced of the opposite, they claim […]

Arguing with people who have different opinions deprives us of a lot of energy

In such a heterogeneous world, it is normal to have different opinions. The strange and disturbing thing would be to think all the same way. Differences are the driving force behind change. They help us understand perspectives and ways of facing life that are different […]

Persuasion techniques: which is the best?

Today many people indiscriminately use the phrases “I I think "and" I feel ". However, some specialists claim that the use predominant "I think" indicates a highly rational and logical person while the prevalence of "I feel" applies more to an emotional person. […]

Public Speaking: How to Eliminate Fear

The very idea of public speaking scares many people. The hands begin to sweat, the heart seems to explode, strange shivers run through the body and voice remains as if paralyzed. In short, a disaster! But it doesn't always have to to be so… I feel too a little […]

Why are we kinder to strangers?

It's more common than you imagine, we've all done it: be kinder to strangers than to people we love. It is easier to say no to someone close to us than to an unknown person, we get angry more easily with those we love than the rest of the people. Why? The reasons […]

Sincericide: The risks of becoming a truth kamikaze

Oscar Wilde said that a little sincerity is a dangerous thing but too much sincerity is absolutely fatal. Undoubtedly, there are great differences between being honest and committing "sincericide", a word that perhaps the language academy does not like but perfectly […]

Words are not enough when what you have to say overflows the soul

Centuries ago, the Roman poet Ausonio said: “whoever does not know how to be silent will not know how to speak”. The truth is that in the world we live in there are more and more people who speak and fewer who listen. The almost obsessive desire to spend time […]

Misinformation or what? The errors we find in the newspapers every day

Once upon a time there were a painter and a shoemaker. The painter was called Apelles and he was one of the most illustrious artists of the time, famous above all for being a very demanding critic precisely towards his work. So much so that he used to exhibit his […]

Everyone talks and criticizes, nobody listens and intends

Talking and criticizing is easy, just open your mouth and say what we think. Listening and understanding is much more difficult because it implies, above all, adopting an active attitude that allows us to put ourselves in the background and empathize with the person […]

Why do we lose the thread of the discussion?

Have you ever lost your train of thought, no longer remembering what to say, with an empty mind, not even remembering what you were talking about? Don't worry, I'd say it happens to everyone from time to time, but… why? Why does this happen?To answer this question, […]

Liquid Relations: The fragility of bonds

We are a faithful reflection of our company. Whether we like it or not, the world around us influences our decisions, behaviors, our value system and even the emotions we feel. We cannot abstract ourselves from the society in which we live so that, in one way or […]

The people around you control your mind

Every day we make hundreds of decisions, some are so trivial that we don't even realize them. Normally, we think we have made a conscious and rational decision, taking into account our needs and desires, but in truth, the decision-making process is mediated by […]

How to help others change?

One of the most frequently asked questions I get asked on my original blog in Spanish is: how do you help someone change? These are usually the people who want their partner to pay them more attention, to stop to drink or support them more, they want their children […]

How to deal with negative criticism?

Winston Churchill once said: "Criticism will never be welcome, but it is necessary." It is true, but it is also true that many of us find it difficult to accept the criticisms, especially when they are negative. There is always the first reaction in which many […]

Say what bothers us when it bothers us and don't wait until it's too late

Usually, when something bothers me, irritates me or hurts me, I say it right away. Expressing this discomfort helps me to get rid of it, at least in part. Conversely, if I don't speak, I end up feeling doubly annoyed. Of course, not everyone reacts the same way. […]

10 toxic words you should eliminate from your vocabulary today

We don't normally pay much attention to the words we use. We tend to believe that we choose them at random, as required by the circumstances, but in reality it has been shown that everyone has a unique way of speaking, as if it were a "verbal trace".In fact, a […]

The psychological rule to console and be consoled without making mistakes

Sometimes it is difficult to find the right words to console someone. Finding the right word at the right time to generate the right resonance is an art that few people master. As a result, sometimes trying to comfort someone fails miserably and ends up adding […]

Argue without getting angry

You are in a bar and are drinking with friends and having a relaxed conversation about it to the recent changes in the world of politics. Suddenly someone proposes a rather delicate topic and everyone ends by discussing it earnestly. This situation can recur […]

Communication: 3 traps we always fall into

Communication is present in every human relationship and is one of our elementary needs. Talking allows us to get to know another person, to discover a world different from ours, and finally, it enriches our support network.However, there are times when communication […]

Affective responsibility, it is neither your fault nor mine but we are both responsible

In an increasingly narcissistic and self-centered society, liquid relationships threaten to become the new standard, a standard of fragile bonds that enhances the tendency to flee when things go wrong. In that environment, emotional responsibility is rare. However, […]

10 benefits of saying what you think

When in life we leave too much room for "politically correct", we run the risk of getting lost and creating fragile relationships in which we do not connect from our essence, but only through social conventions. The consequences are terrible, not only for […]

7 characteristics of empathic people that make them unique

Empathetic people know how to put themselves in others' shoes. Not only do they understand them intellectually, but they feel the same emotions as those around them. They are very sensitive people who connect with others and capture their emotional needs in a special […]

The fragility of people who criticize others

There are people with easy criticism. They are always ready to judge, always have a sharp word on the tip of their tongue and consider themselves superior to others. These people don't let anything pass. They take advantage of it to criticize what we say or do. […]

Indiscreet questions: How to react

You are having lunch at a friend's house and suddenly someone asks you an indiscreet, impertinent or inadequate question. The bite you just swallowed got stuck in your throat, you stare at that person and wonder how he could have asked you that question. This is […]

What do the emojis you use reveal about you?

Emojis are already part of our online communication. However, behind those symbols there is much more than a simple message, they can in fact reveal details of the personality of those who use them. Or at least that's what a study conducted at Edge Hill University […]

We must learn to disagree without attacking

The discrepancies are not bad. What's bad is not knowing how to disagree. Attacking those who think differently. Exclude the dissenter. To close ourselves off to confrontation only because it questions what we believe in.Instead, Socratic dialogue facilitates a […]

Sometimes we just need to be told that everything will be fine

Even strong people sometimes break down. They don't normally give in from weakness, but precisely because they have been too strong and too long. Those people, and all of us in general, sometimes just need to be told that "everything will be fine". Sometimes we […]

Woodpecker Syndrome: People who create a vicious cycle of toxic discussions

We tend to consider perseverance as a virtue, it is a value that our society extols. But persevering isn't always good. There is a time to endure and a time to give up. People with "woodpecker syndrome" don't know exactly when to stop and leave a situation, so […]

Stop talking to someone as a punishment

“Managing silence is more difficult than dealing with speech,” said journalist and politician Georges Clemenceau. Without a doubt, silence can say a lot without saying anything, but we must be very careful when using it because, in the words of musician Miles […]

It is not what you say but how you say it

Between what I think, What I want to say, What I think I say, What I say, What you want to hear, What you hear, What you think you understand, What you want to understand, And what you really understand ... There are probably 9 Undoubtedly, communication between […]

Being uncompromising, the cost of a closed mind

The intransigence of the accounting systems of the Royal Army Medical Corps during World War I prevented war neurosis from being recognized as a pathology, despite the fact that by the end of 1914 it already affected 10% of British officers.According to a study […]

Fixed gaze: why does it bother us?

Let's imagine that we are sitting in a park and suddenly we notice that a person is staring at us. What are we going to do? We look at it for a few seconds but immediately separate the view with some embarrassment. After a few seconds we can't resist the temptation […]

Complimenting Someone: Why Do It More Often?

We all like to receive a compliment. Praise can make us feel good and make our day better. In many cases it helps to shorten the distance between two strangers and makes the meeting more pleasant and relaxed. Other times it serves to tell the other that we are […]

The more technology, the less social skills

Technology can be our ally, but it is also a double-edged sword. Thanks to technology we can stay in touch with the people we love and who are far away or lose contact with those close to us. Technology itself is not harmful, it all depends on what we do with […]

What do your eyes say? 7 messages that send the pupils

In the past it was said that the eyes are the mirror of the soul. In fact, even today many people try to uncover a lie by asking the person to look them straight in the eye. Anyway, is this just a popular myth or is it true that the eyes speak for us? Science has […]

Be more assertive in five techniques

Earlier we referred to assertive rights, but no doubt, those who try to apply them without assuming an assertive attitude themselves will likely end up hitting the wall of convention and rigidity. For this reason, assertiveness does not only mean asserting one's […]

The deception comes in small doses

There is a folk tale that says that if you put a frog in a pot with boiling water it will jump out and flee immediately upon sensing the threat. But if you put it in a pot with cold water, light the fire and slowly raise the temperature, it will not escape, with […]

5 attitudes that separate more than any distance

There are attitudes that separate more than a thousand miles or an ocean. Emotional closeness is not measured in meters or centimeters, but in the psychological harmony one feels. For this, you can be surrounded by many people and still feel alone, or apparently […]

"Lie to me": non-verbal communication

Speaking of the television series that is currently being broadcast: Lie to me, do you know the one whose protagonist has the ability to interpret the micro-expressions of the face and body in order to identify whether the person is telling the truth or is lying? […]

The cell phone: Presence alone influences the conversation

Right now, the fact that the mobile phones affect the quality of interpersonal relationships is no secret to anyone. Indeed, it is a bit there discovery of hot water. We will not be able to be fully present if, while we are together with friends or family, the […]

Do you want others to trust you? Then apologize when it rains!

Do you want others to see you as someone they can trust? The secret is simple: to gain their trust, you just need to apologize for something that doesn't depend on you, like rain.At first glance it may seem absurd, but this is what researchers at Harvard Business […]

Toxic people: 7 strategies to deal with them

Toxic people are everywhere. Sometimes we can also be ourselves under certain circumstances, if we adopt some of these behaviors. However, the truth is that dealing with such people on a daily basis can be stressful and frustrating. In fact, if you don't have the […]

How to stop caring about what others think of you?

We are social beings. Relationships are a source of support and growth, so we need to establish bonds with others, but this also makes us sensitive to their views. We all like to feel accepted and validated. Instead, we don't like feeling excluded or rejected. […]

You always say "yes" when you want to say "no"

Someone asks you something and you say yes, maybe not immediately, but you end up giving up, even if you don't want to. However, as soon as that "yes" comes out of your mouth, something inside you gets stuck. You begin to think about everything that this new responsibility […]

If your sentence starts with “better if I don't say anything”, it's better not to say anything

"I'm not saying anything, but ..." It is likely that on more than one occasion you have heard this phrase or even said it. Apparently it is "respectful", but it automatically puts us on the defensive because deep down we know that the words behind it are useless […]

Facebook, Twitter, Linkedin: are the profiles in social networks real?

There has been a lot of talk (and certainly will continue to talk) about social networks and individual profiles contained in the latter. Currently there are about 700 million people around the world who have entered their profile in networks such as: Facebook, […]

Insulting a person only shows immaturity and lack of argument

Virtually all of us have been the subject of offensive comments and it is even likely that on occasion we have insulted someone. Indeed, the custom of insulting is universal and transversal to all cultures.In any case, insults are the lowest form of expressing […]

3 tricks for remembering names

You meet a person, he introduces himself, and after five seconds you realize that you have forgotten his name. You are so ashamed that you do not have the courage to ask him again and when you come back to see her, you cannot remember his name.In reality, there […]

You are responsible for what you say, not for what others understand

Between what you think,What do you mean, What you think you're saying,What you say,What you want to hearWhat you feel, What you think you understand,What you want to understand,And what do you understand ...There are 9 chances you don't understand!Perfectly […]

Why do we laugh when we feel embarrassed?

Perhaps it has happened to many that we are involved in a very embarrassing and compromising situation in which we feel uncomfortable but we cannot help but laugh, even when we know it would be a totally inappropriate response. Why does this happen? Is this an […]

Interrogations lead to lying

You believe that interrogations favor confessions false? Everyone would probably answer yes. Indeed you are right, but maybe you are making a slight association between interrogation and torture, that it's not the same. One of the films that palpably highlights […]

Verbal Lapsus: What Is Behind These Errors?

Who has never been wrong while speaking and has not confused one word with another? It has been proven that every 1.000 words are committed one or two mistakes. If we consider that the average rhythm of verbal expression is of 150 words per minute, you would make […]

Reactive Listening: Listening to refute, not to understand

Have you ever talked to a person and, although using a huge amount of arguments, did you feel like you were talking to a wall? Even if you tried to explain your reasons and understand his in order to reach an agreement, you probably had the feeling that he did […]

The perfect excuses: The 3 ingredients that cannot be missing

We all make mistakes, it's part of life and learning. But when our mistakes harm others, we must try to repair the damage caused, or at least minimize the consequences. Then that's when excuses come into play. In fact, apologizing in time can avoid greater evils, […]

Do dogs realize we are talking to them?

Between the sixth and the eighteenth month, babies begin to follow the eyes of others with their gaze. In fact, it's something we all do involuntarily. If, while we are talking to a person, he / she moves his gaze in a certain direction, we will tend to do the […]

Verbal violence: words that hurt

Verbal violence leaves no physical traces, but psychological ones run deep. A sentence, spoken at a time when we are particularly vulnerable, can remain etched in our mind, reactivating continuously. Words have incredible power. They can calm and empower us, but […]

Email: the dark side

Without a doubt theemails it is a very powerful, fast and effective tool, with which we can keep in touch with many people even at great distances. However, since nothing in this life is completely black or white, email also has its downsides. These psychological […]

The 3 "Nos" you must learn to use in life

There is a good reason why "No" is one of the first words we learn to pronounce from an early age. In fact, children go through a phase of denial in which they say no to everything, on principle and without going into too much detail. In this way they reaffirm […]

Pratfall Effect: When we make a mistake, we are more likeable

Many people are obsessed with trying not to make mistakes, especially in public. We are ashamed of stumbling or making mistakes when speaking in public. The desire to avoid making mistakes is so intense that it sometimes becomes an obsession. The person focuses […]

Why do we say "I'm fine" when it's not?

"I'm fine".We say it all the time. It is a short sentence. Enjoyable. Confirmative. It allows us to move on to the next point in the conversation without dwelling on ourselves for too long. Without putting your finger in the sore. The problem is that this is […]

Closing your eyes affects moral judgment

We tend to believe that our moral judgments are unassailable, but in reality they are not. And the interesting thing is that sometimes insignificant stimuli are enough to change our mind. In reality, all the stimuli that surround us determine our decisions, even […]

Rules of Conduct: A Curious Milgram Experiment

About 30 years ago the students of the well-known professor and psychologo Stanley Milgram, ventured into the New York subway to implement a very special experiment. The goal was apparently very simple, they had to ask passengers sitting in the subway to give […]

3 psychological effects that make learning a foreign language difficult

Studying a foreign language offers multiple benefits: it increases the growth of brain areas involved in language, improves memory, improves our attention and, last but not least, becomes a protective factor against neurodegenerative diseases. However, learning […]

Are we born liars?

We know someone and in less than ten minutes we've already lied to them three times. Or at least that's what the statistics support. Although the number is probably a little exaggerated, it is certain that lying is a common practice. But ... what are we lying […]

People with prejudices: Do not be consumed in giving explanations to those who believe only what they want to believe

When two mature people "argue" on a topic, even if they don't reach an agreement, they end up gaining both of them because by listening to each other's arguments, they learn something new or get a point of view that enriches theirs.On the other hand, when a prejudiced […]

How to respond when they verbally attack you?

Deciding how to respond when they verbally attack you can make the difference between a constructive discussion and a conflict with unsuspected repercussions. Of course, offensive comments, harmful words and malicious criticism are never welcome, but if you react […]

People who talk too much

At first they seem nice and outgoing. They are sociable people and good conversationalists. But over time their conversation becomes exhausting. Each encounter leaves you without energy. The problem is that these are people who talk a lot, almost always about themselves, […]

Gestures: When the hands speak for you

Extra verbal communication and all i gesti accompanying it are sometimes more interesting than the speech itself. Normally a speech comes accompanied by numerous gestures, these are movements that we make without realizing it account and that we need to emphasize […]

Criticizing constructively, six rules

Criticize it's easy, constructive criticism is an art. Sometimes it seems like the criticism is entered directly in our DNA, avoiding criticizing others always turns out to be a lot to us hard. In fact, I challenge you to go a full day without criticizing anything […]

The devastating power of micro-aggression in everyday life

Small everyday frustrations, such as anger, disappointment, and contempt for petty things, can affect our emotional well-being and physical health more than life's big problems, a University of Houston study found. The problem is that these little frustrations […]

Influence of the group on individual perception

Are you completely sure of your perceptions? Do you think your ability to evaluate could change? Under what circumstances? Are you a suggestible person? Continuing on the subject of manipulation and levels of suggestibility, I remembered an ancient experiment carried […]

Why do we have sudden memory lapses as we speak?

It has probably happened to you more than once: you are talking and suddenly you freeze, you have a sudden memory lapse, you just don't know what to say anymore, it is as if all the information in your mind has been erased in one fell swoop. It can happen when […]

Touch: the effects of human touch

Remember the story of the King Midas that with the touch fingers could to turn anything into gold? Indeed the touch of our hands really possesses extraordinary powers since, even without transforming into objects, we can still influence the mood of others and […]

What lies behind the criticisms?

Have you ever stopped to think how many times do you find yourself judging someone every day? How many criticisms do we hear and how many do we make from when we wake up to when we go to bed? Surely there will be many or in any case, a number that is always too […]

Getting angry: one of the most effective persuasion techniques

I children and psychopaths have something in common: they are great at achieving what they want because most of us can't resist it. And it is true that if we wish to learn the art of persuasion, we should take an example from some of their attitudes. Be aggressive, […]

Staring in the eye is not the best way to convince

In popular imagination, the idea has become established that looking directly in the eye is an excellent strategy for convincing a person. Now, however, research conducted by Harvard and Columbia universities disputes the fact that direct eye contact is the best […]

Speaking Fast: A Persuasion Technique

The art of persuasion often follows gods winding paths and the persuasion techniques they tend to change and become more and more different. One of the more strategies used by salespeople is to speak very quickly. But… speak quickly it is more convincing because […]

Can you lie? Find out with a test

Like it or not, lies are everywhere. According to a study conducted at the University of Massachusetts, if the necessary conditions are met, about 60% of people are able to tell three lies in just 10 minutes of conversation. But some know how to lie better than […]

5 tricks to connect with people you just met

Sometimes it's hard to connect with someone, especially when it comes to someone you've just met. However, much of the success you will have in life will depend on your communication skills and your ability to connect with others. Indeed, "the way we communicate […]

Social Skills: Techniques for Improving Them

Improve the social skills it not only helps to become a better person, but opens many doors in society and can also bring psychological benefits, because it will make us feel more confident and more satisfied with our life.Fortunately, social skills are ways of […]

Argumentum ad hominem: denigrate when arguments are lacking

"Great minds discuss ideas, mediocre minds discuss events, small minds discuss others," said Eleanor Roosevelt. And he wasn't wrong. When intellectual stature is lacking, one falls into the personal mud.Unfortunately, the tendency to denigrate others when there […]

Cooperation in humans and primates

In in the past it was thought that intelligence was the aspect that distinguished being human from the rest of the animals. However, as research progresses in the area of Comparative Psychology other rather surprising truths have been discovered. For instance, […]

Trusting Others - Why Is It Worth It?

With these times, trusting others becomes more and more difficult. Above all because in the common imagination a mistaken belief has been established: the stupid are those who trust, who easily take the bait, while the intelligent, the most cunning ones, are those […]

The word you should never use to apologize

We all make mistakes. We can't help it, and sometimes these mistakes hurt others. Then comes the time to apologize.Apologizing appropriately can repair the damage and strengthen the emotional bond between two people. When we apologize we tell the other that we […]

How to expose a lie?

What's the best way to expose a liar? Surely each of us has different tactics; Vrij, a professor at the University of Portsmouth has shown that the best way to discover a lie is to have the person repeat his version of how things happened in reverse, that is, to […]

When women talk, men disconnect: why?

How many times has it happened to you to observe a couple in which the woman is talking while the man seems to have a lost air, as if it were disconnected from the surrounding world? We know well that some men they seem to have the ability to disconnect when women's […]

Gossip crashes into the smart ear

“You'll never believe what I just learned! Now I'll tell you, but don't tell anyone. " When I hear this, the first thing I think is: "if no one needs to know, you better not tell me". But of course, I remember later that gossip serves as a social glue and […]

Is mimicry effective in communication?

In psychological help manuals and on the subject of communication, one of the most common tips is that to imitate language corporal of the other helps to increase empathy between people. However, in a previous article related to mimicry of gestures, we had already […]

How to successfully argue

Discussing problems is always positive, no matter if it is a matter of difficulties in the relationship of a couple, between parents and children or at work. When a discussion focuses on a specific goal, the likelihood of both parties reaching an agreement and […]

3 secrets of the Stoics to not get involved in meaningless and stupid discussions

Many of the arguments and arguments we have every day are triggered by petty or even stupid reasons, things that aren't even worth discussing. In other cases, the problem lies with our interlocutor and his inability to contemplate any point of view other […]

How to respond to insults intelligently, according to the Stoics

Seneca related that one day, while Cato was visiting the public baths, he was pushed and beaten. When the attack ended, he refused to accept the attacker's apology saying: "I don't even remember being hit."Although his behavior may seem strange to us, Cato simply […]

High class and low class, who is more respectful?

Let's imagine two people: one belongs to the high class and the other to the class low. Let's say the low-class person works in a factory, lives in one small house in a working-class neighborhood and receives a relatively low salary. Obviously, the upper-class […]

7 words that can change your life

We don't usually pay much attention to the words we say, but we are born communicators. Indeed, it seems like a contradiction, but the truth is that we spend all day communicating not only with others but also with ourselves. However, our communication style is […]