3 situations in which explanations should not be given1. When the person in front of you takes on the role of judge. In these cases, the person is not interested in understanding, but just wants to criticize you. Therefore, the rule applies that everything you say or do will be used against you. Don't try to justify yourself in these cases because you would do it in vain.
2. When the person does not assume an attitude open to dialogue. If you notice that your interlocutor is closed in his arguments and does not show himself flexible to other ideas, it is probably because he does not want to listen to your arguments and you will not be able to change his preconceived idea.
3. When the problem doesn't really concern him. There are people who question your life choices and your way of being, without any rights. They are those people who ask you when you will have a baby, why you are not married yet or are not looking for a new job. These questions hide preconceived ideas that you will not be able to change, because in reality what these people want is to impose their vision of what life should be like on you.In these three cases, the attempt to justify ourselves tends to give rise to discussions that end up leaving. a bad taste in the mouth, so it's best to move on as soon as possible.
How to stop these people?- Be aware of your rights. First, it's important to understand that you have every right not to explain if you don't want to. If your decisions and behaviors don't interfere with those of other people, you don't have to justify yourself.
- Set limits. It is essential that uncomfortable questions do not lead to discussions. Therefore, it is necessary to learn to set limits in a diplomatic way. For example, if someone asks you when to get married, you can reply that you currently have other priorities in life. This way you will avoid hurting the person's sensitivity and, at the same time, having to give explanations that they probably would not understand.
- Say thank you. When they give you a tip that you didn't ask for and, in a sense, requires explanation from you, a good strategy is to simply say "thank you". You might say, "I appreciate your advice, but I feel good that way." In this way you will distance yourself from your interlocutor and close the topic.
- Change the subject. Some people have no understanding of diplomacy and continue to delve into our personal life. In these cases, a good strategy to successfully overcome the situation is to change the subject. The most effective choice is usually to ask a completely different question than a topic that interests your interlocutor, so you will make them understand that you no longer want to talk about this topic.