The personality of the child

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Louise Hay
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The personality of the child

There is a basis, a genetic substrate, but the education we receive and the experiences we face will gradually shape the character of the child. 

Last update: April 17, 2022

"Who did he get this way from?" Surely it will have happened to any parent to ask themselves a similar question in noticing certain reactions in their children. The child's personality is sometimes surprising.

Is it possible to change it? Certainly, but we must also think that personality is determined by time and life experiences.



The little ones are born with a certain temperament that we must know how to channel, enhance or correct in order for them to be happy. The aim is to teach them to manage emotions correctly and to live better in society.

It is undoubtedly a complex path that requires dedication, effort, love, patience and some basic psychology notion. But it is an adventure worth taking.

In the following lines we give some clues for understand and possibly try to correct the child's personality.

Factors that determine the personality of the child

1. Genetics

Sometimes it happens to be surprised at how restless the child is, at his unexpected reactions or at his indomitable genius. "From whom did he get it?".

Somehow children inherit part of our parental character. If we look back, we could see many of our gestures in them, simply the years have made us change or mature.

We must accept that every child is born with a given temperament, which we cannot change, but rather guide to enhance their strengths. If we do not intervene, if we allow them any whim, we do not set limits and we do not show communication skills, unpleasant behavior.


They will build theto their personalities year after year, and if we provide them with proper guidelines and address them in a logical and balanced way, we will raise happy children. Or at least we will try.


But if we ask ourselves if the child's personality depends on genetics, the answer is yes. There is a basis, a genetic substrate, but the education that we receive and the experiences we face will gradually shape the character.

2. Temperaments of childhood

Easy temper

Cheerful and undemanding children, who easily adapt to the routine. They are not very active at night, they adapt easily to new situations and their emotions and reactions are quite moderate. They do not make dramas, nor are they aggressive or temperamental.

Despite their quiet disposition, we must not neglect the development of their personality. Sometimes, in fact, they can become withdrawn and hide their emotions.

It may also happen that their brothers have a more complicated character. Parents tend to focus on the more "rebellious" siblings, thinking that the more "calm" children don't need a lot of attention. And it's a mistake, all children need support, love and dedication in equal measure.

Not because they are mild-tempered, we need to spoil our brothers who are not more or make more concessions to them. We tend to pay attention to those who express their emotions, to those who do not isolate themselves, to those who feel integrated.

Children who adapt slowly

They are somewhat reserved children who do not adapt very well to changes. They are a bit fearful, very attached to their parents. In general they tend to be passive and a bit shy and slow.


Experts tell us not to worry, when they reach the age of 6 or 8, many children take a leap in maturity. It may take longer to acquire the reading and writing skills, but their development is correct.


If you recognize your children in this description, give them more time, encourage them, and be patient. By exasperating you with their slowness, they may become anxious and insecure. Be calm, support them and trust them.

-The personality of the capricious child

Very crybaby and somewhat irritable babies from birth. They have a hard time falling asleep and adjusting to any changes. They get nervous easily, are demanding and excessive in showing their emotions, be they happy or sad.


This profile often goes from one extreme to the other: as soon as they have a tantrum they pounce on their parents in search of affection, love and are angry at the same time. How to act in the face of these behaviors?

Establish clear guidelines, routines and rules. If the child has a tantrum, it must be made to understand that through such a reaction he will achieve nothing. Be demanding, but show closeness and understanding.

Teach the child to manage anger, to channel it. Let them think before you act. The child who displays such a personality can become very creative and independent in the future.

Active children

Very restless children who do not stop for a second, who are interested in everything and who have a thousand questions. They can also be reckless, which is why they tend to get into small accidents at times.

At the age of three, this aspect is further accentuated and the child's personality is clearly manifested. If the parents can't handle the situation, going to the psychologist is a great help.


The practitioner will determine whether the child has attention deficit disorder with or without hyperactivity (ADHD). The very active child, however, does not always have a disorder, they can simply be more lively than the average person. This requires more patience and adaptability on the part of mom and dad.

Always remember that parents must be an example for their children. Act with balance, calm, patience and the desire to accompany them on the path of growth and maturation.

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