The single parent faces the challenge of taking care of themselves and their children without the support of their partner. However, the following tips may help you enjoy this role.
Last update: 08 September, 2022
Raising a child alone can be physically and emotionally exhausting. However, for many people, being single parents is a daily reality. It means taking care of minors without a companion along the way.
Lack of time, too many duties, feelings of guilt or failure can affect the mental health of these parents, and consequently can affect the education given to their children. That's why we want to give you some useful tips for single parents.
In the next lines we will refer to all those people who, for the most diverse reasons, exercise their role as parents without a partner at their side.
Because they got divorced, their spouse died, they became parents as a result of insemination, they adopted alone or any other situation, some challenges all these circumstances share.
Managing emotions for single parents and their children
Depending on why you have come to raise your children without a partner, emotions can vary, but you have to learn to manage them.
Following a separation or death, going through a period of bereavement is essential, not just to process the pain associated with the loss but to accept that the life plan we had drawn up will not come true.
During adoption or insemination, feelings of guilt resulting from not being able to offer their children a traditional two-parent family can appear.
On the other hand, it can also be difficult for minors to accept that only one parent will be part of their daily life. Here because it is important to give free rein to sadness, anger, frustration and the confusion of adults and children.
Communicating in an open and free way is essential; Writing can also be a great tool to give space to emotions, but if necessary, remember that asking for help from a professional is a valid option.
In search of his own tribe
The single parent has to take charge of the education of the children, housework and work. In this case, lack of time and limited time flexibility can interfere with one's own well-being and that of the children.
Therefore, try to surround yourself with a community that can offer you support from different points of view, so that you can cope with stress and its consequences.
If you can, go live near your family; it will be a point of reference in the life of your children and, moreover, it will be able to give you all the support you need. Yet all of this is not enough. Getting in touch with various trusted professional figures (pediatrician, midwife, nanny ...) can be really useful and offer peace of mind.
At the same time, joining parent support groups can be a great way to resolve concerns and sharing experiences and concerns with other adults in the same situation as you.
Time for yourself and self-care
Although time is short, it is essential not to neglect personal care. You may be tempted to just take care of the children and do your homework.
However, psychological and emotional health can be compromised by the absence of room for fun, idleness and good habits.
In addition, it is important to take care of your diet, find time for physical activity, to socialize, to follow your passions or simply to be alone.
All of this is anything but an act of selfishness: remember that your children need a happy and rested father or mother. Only in this way can you give them the attention, example and patience they need.
Value your family
It may be that the idea you had years ago about what you would have been in the future is very far from the reality you live. Maybe you would have preferred that things had turned out differently.
It may also be that you feel that others judge you or that you feel rejected by them. Still, your lifestyle is as good as that of others and so is your family.
Instead of focusing on what went wrong, the shortcomings and self-compassion, try to develop a positive attitude. Get used to valuing and grasping the benefits, qualities and opportunities around you. Be grateful for your life as it is.
By doing this you will see that your children will adopt a similar attitude to yours and will feel strong, satisfied and proud of the family they are part of.
Single parents can raise happy and healthy children
Studies indicate that children of single parents tend to enjoy lower self-esteem and greater dissatisfaction because of your own situation. Yet, we also know that the absence of one of the parents does not necessarily translate into such a scenario.
The absence of another adult who in some way gives balance and support in certain circumstances can lead to be more permissive or, on the contrary, excessively authoritarian.
If that's the case for you, you'll have to work on it. Take care of yourself, delegate, seek help and guidance if needed. Be proud of your family: your children will grow up healthy and happy.