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    My wife doesn't want to make love: causes and solutions

    Who I am
    Joe Dispenza
    @joedispenza
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    Probably, until recently, your sexuality as a couple was booming and you had no cause for concern. Still, if you are reading this today, it means that you are trying to understand because your wife doesn't want to make love and, consequently, what you can do to make things right.

    In reality we are talking about a much more common situation than you think, especially in long-standing marriages. At first it's all new, beautiful and overwhelming, but over time the relationship becomes more habitual, and sometimes even a little boring.



    And unfortunately, this reality also affects the sphere of sexual relations. However, as we will see in more detail shortly, monotony is not the only one responsible for your wife's loss of desire: the causes can be very many.

    In any case, you have nothing to worry about. Today together we will analyze this issue more closely, so that you can have greater awareness and, above all, know how to move with her to go back to feeling accomplices under the sheets.

    Why my wife doesn't want to make love: the causes

    To understand which solutions to adopt it is first necessary to understand where the problem arises. When the wife doesn't want to make love, they can be there multiple causes that come into play and that lead to this absence of desire.

    First of all it must be said that after so many years of marriage it is normal to experience a decreased sexual desire, since, as we know, routine is able to take away the enthusiasm and novelty of the couple.


    Routine, in fact, can also be experienced under the sheets, especially when relationships become uninvolving and spontaneous. Consequently, this leads to a decline in sexual desire since the intercourse itself it is no longer what it used to be.


    Furthermore, it must be considered that there are some events in married life, such as for example the birth of a child, which can occupy a woman's mind and energies a lot.

    This, in fact, is a fairly common case: after the birth of the baby the wife is completely absorbed by him, and the attentions towards the husband tend to decline. It is a game of balances that, especially at the beginning, it is difficult to know how to manage.

    However, we cannot dwell only on external causes and circumstances. A woman may not want to make love even because of how things are going within the couple.

    During period downin fact, it is normal for sexual desire to undergo a drastic decrease. On the other hand, if things don't work out of bed it's very difficult for them to work under the sheets.

    Finally, we have those cases where the wife doesn't want to make love because she no longer feels attracted to her husband, maybe it has a lover or is trying to escape from the monotony of the relationship.


    In short, the reasons can be many, but in any case, when the wife does not want to make love it is important to avoid pretending that the problem does not exist. To solve the problem you have to rekindle the passion, otherwise you run the risk of facing a serious couple crisis.

    My wife doesn't want to make love: what to do

    Now that we have seen the reasons that could lead a wife not to want to make love, we can move on to the next step. Here, in fact, you will find some interesting ideas to understand what to do and how to behave with her.


    What I want to tell you, however, is not to have too many demands in terms of time. For whatever reason your wife doesn't have the desire to make love to you, you have to give her time to "unlock" and to regain desire.

    These 4 tips will help you get there, but don't make the mistake of thinking it's a situation that will resolve itself within a week. Sexual desire is not controlled, therefore you have to give her time to relive it on her skin and feel it again.

    1. Don't make them weigh it

    The first piece of advice I would like to give you if your wife does not want to make love is to don't be pushy or heavy with her. Many men react badly to this situation, and don't realize that it only makes it worse.


    If your wife doesn't feel like making love, she already knows she's missing you, so there is no need to put the finger further into the sore. By making her feel "guilty" she will feel pressured, she will withdraw even more in herself, and the sexual desire will only diminish further.

    So, even though I know it's not an easy situation to handle, it is wise to control your emotions and reactions in the face of his denials. Try to be understanding, because she will appreciate it very much.

    2. Talk to her about it

    Once she does not feel "guilty" towards you, and that you have done everything to avoid making her lose her desire to weigh, you can address the topic together in a way sincere e constructive.


    Again, talking about it does not mean unloading everything on her, but understanding what may be the causes that are leading her to live this moment. You must be his accomplice, not the judge of his behavior.

    Help her open up to you, listen to her and try to make her feel your closeness. In such a situation it is it is very important to know how to communicate, because without communication there will be no starting point from which to start in order to resolve things.

    3. Become more attractive

    Now, I know that by giving you this advice you may think that you are the cause of the situation, but that is not my intent. The point is, the decrease in sexual desire can be also associated with a decline in attraction.

    Maybe it's not your case, but since you're here trying to figure out what to do because your wife doesn't want to make love, try to become more attractive in his eyes it won't harm you.

    This means take care of your fitness, perhaps starting to go to the gym again (or doing any other physical activity). At the same time, paying attention to style is also very important.

    This is one thing women watch a lot about their man, especially in the home environment. So always keep yourself tidy, clean, with your beard and hair in place, and maybe get a few sprinkles of the every now and then perfume that you know she likes it so much.

    But becoming more attractive in his eyes also requires a commitment to make your life more interesting. If you dedicate yourself more to your hobbies, cultivate your social life and keep a minimum of "mystery" in his eyes, for sure his passion for you will suddenly rekindle.

    4. Recreate complicity

    The fourth and last piece of advice I give you if your wife doesn't want to make love is to try to recreate complicity with her out of bed. As we said earlier, i sexual intercourse is the litmus test how things are going between you.

    And in this you have the possibility to intervene through attentions, cuddles ed effusions. Hug her every now and then, tell her how beautiful she is even if she's in her pajamas and approach her without the "ulterior motive" of going to bed together.

    It is important that she feels wanted, but without the perception that you are only doing it with the intent of having a relationship. That's why you might occasionally propose to give her massages, with the aim of increase physical contact in a "harmless" way.

    Furthermore, to recreate the complicity it is very important to give the right attention to your couple: avoid always staying at home or always doing the same things. Try to create new situations where you can be comfortable together, because this is important for her to feel the desire to join you in a deeper way.

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