Love phrases: the right words to enlarge (and share) your heart

Who I am
Louise Hay

Author and references

I think one love phrase it's really beautiful not when you read it and like it.

She is beautiful when you reread it and it broadens your heart allowing you to improve the way you live and love.

In addition to the "official love phrases" that we have selected for you, every other word on this page, you will see, can prove to be a perfect phrase to share or simply reflect on.

Happy reading, and happy sharing 😉

If you love someone you don't solve their problems, but you stay close to them as they deal with them

I think this is the most common mistake: protect those we love by avoiding difficulties and problems or maybe by solving them ourselves, in the first person, in their place.

This way though make the person you love weak, fragile, dependent on you and you deny her the chance to grow and become strong.

A process that also requires making mistakes and having to deal with suffering.

The point is also another, perhaps the most important: when you solve problems who you say you love, you do it for yourself.

If I can't bear to see the one I love suffer, if I feel bad when someone has a problem and is sick, then I do not intervene to help others, but myself.

I do it in order not to feel bad, since the discomfort of the other (in the face of his problems) becomes suffering for me. And so another love phrase comes to mind.

You can't really love me if you can't see me suffer

To love means to let myself be free to be what I am and to become what I want.

But life often involves too mistakes, problems and suffering.
If you can't see me suffer, simply you will not allow me to live, to experience, to try and also, of course, to make mistakes.

If you cannot see the one you love suffering, you will deny them time to understand and understand (sometimes we have to hit our heads multiple times before realizing our mistakes!).

Can you stand next to me while I cry?
If you can do it, if you don't need (because otherwise you are hurting!) To stop my tears: then you can welcome them and me.

Then you can to understand, you can set me free, you can love me.
And this will also be the most important moment in which to do it, as Catullus asked.

Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I need it most (Catullus)

Deserved love, Fromm suggested, lets pass the idea that it is not something truly authentic, something we receive "because it is me".

But only because I'm useful.

In my opinion, love is not deserved.
Or if you prefer, we all deserve it.

I understood that behind every negative action, even the most despicable, there is always the fear.
We see malice, where ignorance exists instead.

We can defend ourselves from bad people with love.
To do this, however, we must understand that wickedness is fear.

In life there are only two possibilities: Love and Fear.
Your life depends on this choice, which you make in every moment and which you can change or repeat in every subsequent moment.

Fear brings suffering and destruction.
Love brings happiness and growth.

The world will never be saved by rules, punishment, rigidity or aggression.
There is no violence that has produced something good without creating as many disasters.

Love is the only solution, paraphrasing Fromm, to the problem of human existence, or rather to suffering and all evil.
When someone gets it wrong and you think they "don't deserve" your love, then it means that he really needs it.

And what love will it be that we deny precisely to those who need it?

When I love I want the happiness of the other.
When the other is suffering (and for this reason he would not "deserve" your love), in reality he has only one possibility to save himself from the pain: thelove.

It won't be yours to save it.
My friend, you will offer that person the opportunity to change your life.

It is not up to us whether others will take this opportunity.
But we can always offer it.

And excuse me if it is little.

In love, as in art, constancy is everything (Ennio Morricone)

La steadiness it's all in love.
Love is a decision.

And the decision is such if it comes persecuted with constancy for some time.
How much time? What is necessary for the realization of the purpose which that decision tends.

If I believe I love one or more people, but faced with the difficulties that relationships inevitably present, I change my decision and stop loving, I don't love anymore.

Love has two apparently opposite pairs of characteristics.

The first: he asks lifetime to be learned and practiced.
But it can also be put into practice in an instant, and that instant of love will have an infinite value that no one will ever be able to erase.

When I had my son, I expected so many things.
And I've made so many mistakes.

At one point I wondered if he wouldn't have grown better without me. Then I realized: my expectations had to be polite, my love had to mature.

Together with my baby, I had to go on a growth path.
At the same time, our history full of errors was studded, moment by moment, with myriads of tiny gestures of love that had an infinite meaning.

When he grows up, he will be able to say that I was so wrong with him. He may even say that I ruined his life.

How many children attribute this to their parents.
But he can also choose, if he wishes, of remember how much I loved him, how much love has passed between us.

Tiny and immense gestures, like when, a few days ago, just around my birthday he, seeing a pack of dog hygiene bags in a shop, decided to use his coins to give it to me.

I swear to you that this gift is one of the most beautiful I've ever received, despite having had a few thousand times more important economically.

The second pair of seemingly opposite characteristics is that love requires one tenacious and unstoppable constancy (as Morricone said) and also, on the contrary, a formidable elasticity, a continuous readiness for change.

If you want to learn to love, you must never surrender to your own meanness, never be discouraged by your mistakes. Trust is needed.

In short, all these oxymorons make us understand that love is never taken for granted, it is never boring.

Do not judge as wrong what you do not know, take the opportunity to understand (Pablo Piacasso)

I still remember my first contact with a surfboard at the age of 9: while I was walking with my cousin and suddenly the waves of the sea brought to the shore a very worn surfboard and even a little broken.

After I worked hard to get my parents to let me try and that I would be careful they let me. What wonderful emotions I felt at the thought of being able to try even if the best was yet to come.

And do you know how it got there?

With much commitment, with patience, concentration, perseverance and self-confidence.

The confidence that by dint of not giving up I would be able to balance on that board while learning to ride the waves.

That day I could have listened to the opinions of others, I could have been satisfied with the emotion I felt in finding that surfboard, and then left it in a corner for fear of negative judgments and continuous disapproval, on the part of those who saw us alone. something wrong with my choice.

Instead I didn't give up, I wanted to understand, discover, try, in one word I was simply loving. Loving that instant that I didn't know what it would bring or transform in me.

Life is a continuous choice and I have chosen to continue wanting to carry on what I believed and hoped for with determination and love.

If I love I am happy, if I love I am confident, if I love I am positive, if I love I am one step away from becoming more aware every day and consequently strong.

If I love I don't need to judge because love makes everything perfect.

So we don't get lost in judging something wrong, right or not but we transform every moment into love, on one occasion for be surprised by what we will understand and it will happen thanks to our love in one's life path.

"Love to love, not to have something in return, otherwise it is not love" (Leo Buscaglia)

It is the invitation to love written in the book "Live, love, understand each other".
I was very impressed for the absence of two letters: "SE".

Since we were children we are educated with the "IF": if you are a good Santa Claus he will bring you gifts, if you behave well you can play football, if you make me angry then it means that you do not love me ...

Continuing to grow, the "SE" is always present and, indeed, it is strengthened.

I am polite to you if you are polite to me, if you talk to me screaming I will do the same, if you return my greeting I will continue to greet you, if you behave as I like, I will continue to go out with you, if you are available to be close to me as much as I ask, I continue to be your friend ...

The "SE" implies one condition, a deal.

I greet you on condition that you do the same, I love you "as long as" you do the same. I only do something if I get something in return and that something is for me Useful.

What does it mean that it is useful for me?

It means that I have a specific interest: you not only have to say goodbye but you have to do it as it should be done in my opinion, according to my rules, my conditions, according to the times and methods that I expect and which for me are fair and objective.

If you greet me without smiling or in a low tone of voice, it will not be a good greeting for me, for example, when my rules require you to greet with a smile and a firm tone of voice.

It doesn't matter if you are tired at that moment or are simply cold and voiceless, your greeting is not good and next time I will think twice before deciding whether to say hello again.

Another important point is this: What kind of emotions do I feel when my SELF is not respected?

When you greet me as I believe to be right: I feel positive emotions (happiness, enthusiasm). When you greet me in a way other than what I believe to be correct: I have negative emotions (disappointment, disrespect)

Whenever my "IF" is respected I feel positive emotions and when, conversely, my "IF" is not satisfied, I feel negative emotions.

This applies to all the "situations" we live, from the most "simple" such as the greeting, to the most "complex" such as the couple relationship.

Buscaglia invites you to live the gratuity of love: to love to love and not to have something in return. If I love to have something in return, it is not love but interest.

To love by freeing oneself from placing conditions e not making the choice to love depend on what others do.

Only by eliminating the "IF" am I able to love you without placing conditions. Is it possible to learn to love for free?

One way is also suggested by Anthony De Mello who explains how to live perfect love.

“Perfect love drives out fear. Where there is love there are no demands, no expectations, there is no dependence. I don't expect you to make me happy; my happiness does not lie in you "(Anthony De Mello)

There are two great emotions: love and fear.

Love is openness, availability, listening, welcoming, understanding, patience, calm, strength ...

Fear is closure, rigidity, judgment, impatience, haste, fatigue. Fear is always linked to suffering, the fear of being sick and suffering.

I love and am happy.
I am afraid and I am sad.

Loving with the "IF," on condition that ", is not love as it is believed but, fear "disguised".
It is a deception.

How can you not live in fear?

Training to live perfect love:

  • I have no requests: it's free. I love you without asking for anything in return, just for the sake of loving and I have no interest or conditions to enforce.
  • I have no expectations: it is unlimited. Not only do I not ask for anything, but I don't even have more or less implicit expectations, there are no limits or conditions that can prevent me from loving.
  • There is no addiction, I don't expect you to make me happy; my happiness does not lie in you: it is infinite. My love, my being happy does not depend on you, on if and how you act towards me, if you behave as I expect or that you return my love. If my happiness does not depend on others, I have the strength to infinitely love everything and everyone.

Perfect love is unconditional love and drives away fear and suffering.

Another tip for how to experience unconditional love comes from a famous American doctor.

“When you cure a disease you can win or lose. When you take care of a person, you always win "(Patch Adams)

To love means to "take care of".

If I train myself to love, then I choose to take care of someone, myself or something. This is a choice that I can always make because it depends only on me and not on external conditions that I cannot control.

I always have the freedom and the power to choose how to live every moment of my life. I can always choose to love and "take care of" without conditions.

Taking care means committing to knowing, understanding, listening, violating, doing concrete things to help someone, doing things calmly and carefully.

In some situations, making someone “just” feel one's presence can be everything and be worth a lot.

That's when I cure the disease, I can win or lose.
Diseases cannot always be cured.

When I take care of the person, I listen to him, him gift my presence, my understanding, my time, my words, my smiles, my hugs, my gaze, give something extraordinary and unique and this can only lead to victory.

This approach is all the more true the more challenging the disease.

It is not said that it is easy, on the contrary, it is often complex and requires commitment, but it is always possible.

When I don't know how to take care of someone, I can ask myself: if I were that person, with his history, his beliefs, his experience, what would I like to receive?

To love means to do to others what I would like others to do to me.

When I love unconditionally, “I take care of”, do I always win?

One can learn to love unconditionally and be happy.
So why not do it?

It is a path, it requires commitment but it is possible for everyone.

One way to learn it, for example, is to enroll in Giacomo's school.

I also recommend that you start doing a very simple exercise every day: the exercise of gratitude.

Every day, as soon as you wake up and before falling asleep, train yourself to become aware of all that you can be grateful for: say thank you the room or house you live in, say thank you the bed in which you sleep, say thank you your body, say thank you your being alive, the food you have eaten, the company of any people you live with or have met or heard of, say thank you to be able to see or smell or taste food, say thank you the book you can read or the music you can listen to.

The more you train yourself to be grateful for what you have every day, the more I would learn to be strong in love because gratitude distances the "SELF", does not demand and does not place conditions?

Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you (Jesus)

When, about twelve years ago, I decided to "welcome as my spouse" the person with whom I had chosen to share my life, the priest who would marry us asked me to choose a passage from the Gospel that I would personally read during the ceremony. .

I had no doubts in wanting to share this passage from the Gospel of Luke with everyone present.

But who is this "enemy"?

  • Enemy can be the shopkeeper or telephone operator who, perhaps deeply stressed and frustrated, treats you badly and gets impatient at your every question, even polite and kind.
  • Enemy is there grim neighbor who never responds to your greeting and you don't understand why.
  • Enemy is ex-friend or ex-partner who did not have the strength to stay close to you and betrayed you.
  • I am also an enemy difficulties, uncomfortable situations, misfortunes, obstacles, often challenging and some seemingly without solution, that you encounter along your path.

When I was little my mother often told me that when I was prey to negative emotions of anger, envy, jealousy, frustration, my face, like everyone's, became "dirty".

At that age I was not able to understand the true meaning of his term so I hurried, worried, to look in the mirror fearing to find myself with a black face covered with soot! 😀

Yet these words of his sometimes come back to my mind because, observing over the years others but also myself, I have clearly "seen" how the face of a person in the grip of anger and resentment is profoundly transformed, and we certainly do not become more beautiful and radiant ...

And, looking beyond that stiff and almost unnatural face, I saw all the harm we do first of all to ourselves.

The harm we do to ourselves rejecting a realityà that in any case, in addition to not changing one iota, maybe we contribute, with our anger, to further worsen.

The harm we do to ourselves when we do not choose to grasp the positive that lies behind every difficultyà, looking only at the downsides.

The harm we do to ourselves getting lost there'opportunityà, perhaps unique, to help free, even for a moment, a suffering person from his mask of aggressionà and hate.

A dear friend of mine, Deborah, one day introduced me to a wonderful phrase that often comes to mind.

“When someone makes you angry, it is as if an arrow has been shot at your heart. But they didn't hit you, and he's lying on the ground at your feet. Then you pick it up and hit yourself again and again, over and over. This is what happens with anger. Anything in life can cause a fight, but the choice to get angry or not is ours alone "(Chagdud Tulku Rinpoche)

The image of the arrow by which we delude ourselves that we have been hit, makes me reflect on the fact that most of the times we try, with fear and conviction, to defend ourselves, even aggressively, from a potential threat, in reality the damage we think we're doing è just imaginary.

Not even to do it on purpose, just as I am writing these lines, I have just witnessed from my bedroom window a very violent fight between one of my cats and the cat of a neighbor who comes every day "to visit" in our garden from an early age. with mastery 😉

It was a moment, the neighbor's cat had just boldly crossed our gate and I saw my cat throwing herself violently at him and then fight with hatred, heedless of the rain. (do not worry, now each of them is at home on a warm blanket licking their wounds 😀)

Often I also talk about it with the neighbor and, from our human point of view, we are sorry that, despite both having a home, are loved and cared for, do not have to fight either for food or for a kennel, they do nothing but hate each other and fight and, inevitably, get hurt.

For what?
For a'illusion.

For the same illusion, on the part of both, that the'other pose a threat. 

Another of my cats, a very territorial sissy, is defined by many as very aggressive.

In reality she is very affectionate and tender, but very scary and sees a threat in everything. A trifle is enough to make it swell and make it put into demonic screams to terrify the whole building.

And, of course, most of the time, there is no trace of real danger ...

What about us humans?
Do we behave so differently when we feel threatened?

Before throwing yourself angrily at your "enemy", as my cat did, I suggest you stop and think to identify (perhaps in writing) first of all exactly how and in what way do you feel threatened, in what the behavior of that person or the situation you face do you think it will harm you and why is a problem for you.

And if for every problem you find a solution (and for every problem there is at least one solution) you will see that paradoxically l'very idea of "enemy" no aprà più reason to exist.

In reality, in most cases (of course I am not referring to situations of real danger and physical threat, from which you must naturally defend yourself), the belief that someone or something can harm you, is something that you create in your mind.

As you acquire more every day safety, strength, abilityà to find solutions, independence and serenityà, as you learn a recognize the'opportunityà behind the difficultiesà and obstacles, the more you will be able to see the "enemies" for who they really are: people who, like you, wish to be understood, listened to and loved, human beings who, just like you, sometimes they are afraid and feel threatened, of the suffering souls who they have not yet found or do not know the way to be happy.

And, you have no idea the difference you could make, in the life of each of these people, but especially in yours, starting to give love instead of responding with hatred, offering understanding and listening rather than pushing away with rejection, and giving your contribution on every occasion in spite of everything, rather than condemning.

“To give means to be rich. Not the one who has a lot is rich, but the one who gives a lot "(Erick Fromm)

These are just a few words, but several times I happened to quote this phrase when talking about love and selfishness.

Only those who are rich can donate.
And how could I do it if I have nothing?

Those who are poor, on the other hand, will try to take in order to feed themselves.
After all, he has nothing, how could he not?

And so far it all seems obvious.

But you could tell me, true, but those who are rich may not give and think only of taking to increase their wealth. Selfishness…

Yeah, but will this person really be rich?

The truth is that selfishness leads to accumulating what we want, but it does nothing but impoverish people and now I'll explain why 🙂

Think of a bank account, you could even have a million euros, but if you don't invest the money loses value.

Accumulating them without investing them makes them unnecessary.

And how could a useless thing have any value?

This is how a selfish person thinks he is rich, but when he goes to buy bread he will find that that money cannot buy anything anymore.

Now they're just worthless pieces of paper and that person realizes they are immensely poor.

The richness of a person does not depend on the money he has, but by value that owns!

Like a large bank account, it does not make those who own it rich, but those who invest it.

If I use my account money to grow a business, for example, I am producing double wealth.

The company grows and my capital too.

1 + 1 = 3 or maybe more : )

Loving is like investing your wealth to make it grow more and more.

"The more the conscience expands, incorporating in itself others and the whole world, the more the individual understands that the needs, needs and well-being of others are his needs, his well-being and his needs" (Daniel Lumera)

That's why "not the one who has a lot is rich, but the one who gives a lot"

When we understand all this then we feel the true value of love.

That is the moment when our consciousness expands and we feel hunger coming. This time, however, the hunger is not to take, but to give.

Love, not selfishness, because the good of others is our good.

Paradoxically, the ability to be alone is the primary condition for the ability to love (Erich Fromm)

Fromm, in his book The Art of Loving, clearly writes like this wonderful engine that unites everyone, indiscriminately on the face of the Earth, both an art that is learned like music, painting, writing, poetry, engineering, and as an art, can only improve with practice, action, commitment, understanding of its own nature.

Love, the most sought after of man's needs, requires commitment and energy, we make the mistake of living it as a part in its own right, detached and independent from the rest of our interests despite its truest nature. For this reason, perhaps, the path of love is the most sought after but, to quote R. Frost, the least traveled.

The ability to be alone is not understood as the will or the choice to suffer, to deprive oneself of something, to isolate oneself, but to undertake a real love story first of all with oneself.

Do you love yourself?

Loving yourself is not a form of selfishness, self-centeredness, but a form of attention and gratitude to life.

You see, in this moment you are reading and your intellectual, perceptive, emotional faculties are in motion together with the breath, the beating of your heart, the movement of your body.

How much awareness do you have of this?

Ability to be alone is equivalent to feeling good about yourself, becoming aware of the sense of your own "I" that gives color, shape, direction to the reality you live.

Being comfortable with yourself requires care, attention and above all listening to know each other better.

How can I know what I need if I don't listen to me?

How can I listen to myself if I don't put my commitments on pause, I don't dedicate time to myself, I don't understand my emotions?

And from here, the beauty starts, the distinctive trait of love: the give.

By giving you receive, forgetting yourself you find yourself

If you understand yourself, your nature, your uniqueness, your worth, then you will see the same uniqueness in the eyes of others.
Your giving will never be a privation, but a free gift that draws its pleasure and its richness in the very act of giving.

Here because if I love myself, I am capable of loving, that's why love for oneself precedes love for others. I cannot give what I don't have because then yes, giving sees a kind of sacrifice, privation.

In my life I have had volunteer experiences that have led me to live very different realities from mine, I have encountered different cultures, different ways of living and thinking, but I have not fully accepted this precious gift.

Maybe I was too young to understand, maybe how the fruits on the trees slowly reach their maturity before being picked, even these experiences have been like fruits that today come to me with a different maturation.

The fruit that I now reap is not of the sacrifice and deprivation of my comforts as they lived then, but of bring me for what I am without depriving myself of anything.

So what does it mean to "forget"?

It means undressing of one's selfishness, from appearances that only make us more vulnerable, from the need for approval, from the absolutist conception of good or bad, right and unjust, from comforts.

Under these "clothes" that are tight on us, there is the true man, the man rediscovered, renewed, capable of giving because he loves himself and knows how to love in turn.

What do you get?

Love knows many ways and ways in which to manifest itself, it doesn't know just one way. Sometimes it is direct and straightforward, other times it is light and silent, but it goes straight to the essence of man.

In a book, I read a sentence that went something like this: "Taking people to heart is different from filling your heart. Do not I use others to fill, but I love making freedom possible ”.

Here, I can mention Buscaglia. I have read his books indeed, I drank them as one drinks fresh water in the desert.

“Maybe love is the process by which I gently bring you back to yourself. Not to what I want you to be, but to what you are "(Leo Buscaglia)

See, after understanding that "I" am the perfect "myself" if stripped of useless clothes (process), I am able to understand, to welcome, because I have made room in my heart.

There is nothing more beautiful than that speak openly with a person without feeling the feeling of being judged but feel free to say and be what you really are.

“Not to what you want to be, but to what you are”… what a liberation to be able to throw away all those different masks intended for different contexts!

What a liberation to be yourself everywhere then, to always feel at home!

But if I choose this for myself because it frees me, why not do the same with others?
Accept them for what they are and not what I need to see? Gently…

I don't use but I love, I take people to heart.

I really understood that loving is an art that you never stop learning, which is demanding but full of deep and true joys, which is intimate but therefore does not deserve to remain hidden and divided from one's way of doing and acting, it is a way of living, of being, a choice of life applicable in any context .

Love is not a static emotion, not even a virus that brings with it suffering, illusion, anger, resentment, disappointment ... love is life, joy, movement, it is

Love phrases: the 15 most unusual

I honestly think that the love phrases you have read are quite unusual, you do not find them easily on the sites today or in the social posts.

Precisely for this reason they will be much more significant: you can share something different from the usual and above all you can really reflect on the meaning behind these words.

When you read a sentence about love, don't just share it.

Think about it, make it yours, or rather, make love yours ever more deeply, thanks also to that sentence that offers you a point of view that you may never have considered.

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