Yes, we become more withdrawn as we age

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Joe Dispenza

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We change with the passage of time. It would be strange if we were still eternal teenagers afflicted with Peter Pan syndrome or if we continued to think like we did when we were 20 years old. Life experiences change us and shape our personality.

However, one of the most common changes over the years is the tendency towards introversion. This explains why we feel more comfortable staying at home enjoying a good movie comfortably on the sofa rather than going out to have fun with friends, or why we give more and more importance to solitude and silence.

Intrinsic maturation

In psychology, changes that occur independently of life experiences are referred to as "intrinsic maturation". This phenomenon refers to the fact that our personality becomes more balanced as the years go by.

As a rule, as people age, they become more emotionally stable and more self-aware. They also become calmer and more independent, need to socialize less to be happy because they stop identifying with the group and don't need constant approval.

That is why as time goes by our social life becomes more relaxed and we enjoy a quiet life more. Interestingly, this phenomenon is also seen in extroverted people, not just introverts; that is to say, each in his own way modulates his attitude.

Being more introverted is good

From an evolutionary point of view, the tendency towards introversion makes a lot of sense and is probably positive. When we are young, extroversion helps us establish meaningful social and emotional bonds and even find a life partner.

Later, when we already have a circle of close friends and a partner, continually meeting new people becomes less important. At this stage we are more committed to strengthening the bonds we have built.

It is as if in the first part of life our goal was to expose ourselves to the world to discover what it has to offer, while in the second part we consider it more important to give meaning to all this and continue to cultivate the established bonds.

The relative solitude and tranquility of this second phase of life also allows us to be alone with ourselves and discover the person we have become. While in adolescence and youth we try to discover who we are by opening up to the world and exploring different roles, in adulthood comes security and trust, which is why we prefer the exercises of introspection.

On the other hand, in adulthood we understand that we not only need to take a break from work, but also from social life, because constant commitments exhaust us. In fact, a study conducted at the University of Helsinki showed that socialization causes exhaustion. These researchers found that being sociable, communicative, and meeting lots of people caused exhaustion for at least three hours.

This tendency to introversion is also affected by the fact that we value our time much more, which leads us to be more selective with our friendships. This means that we prefer to cultivate those relationships with which we have common values ​​and feel that they bring us something.

Of course, all this does not mean that as we mature we become hermits and we do not need social contacts, but interests change as well as our way of relating.

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