Last update: April 08, 2016
Children with special needs do not need compassion, but certainly other attitudes: naturalness, affection and understanding. Nobody likes to be looked at with compassion.
A compassionate look can hide the best intention in the world, but it can also stigmatize and underestimate the person in front of you.. When they look at us with compassion for a physical defect, for our financial situation or for having made a mistake, we feel even worse and think “what did I do wrong to deserve all this punishment?”.
The child and his family experience an infinite number of stressful situations that can be mitigated if there is quality social support, in which they feel protected and understood. We will now talk to you about some of the situations that certain parents and their children face, so that you can develop an appropriate empathic attitude towards them..
A difficult diagnosis
Pregnancy for every woman is a reason for happiness and all mothers and fathers want things to go well, that their child is born healthy in order to face the demands of an increasingly demanding world..
Some tests done during pregnancy can detect the presence of genetic problems, consequences of teratogenesis and other incurable diseases affecting the fetus. Parents will have to face the situation and decide whether or not to proceed with the pregnancy, based on their way of thinking and their personal values that we will not pause to describe.
That is to say, many mothers and fathers are diagnosed with the diagnosis already during pregnancy. In other cases, the diagnosis will be made at birth and it may be that the baby is having difficulties as he begins to grow. In any case, it is always a difficult, complicated and emotionally impactful diagnosis.
It is in that moment that the woman, alone or with her partner, understands that motherhood will be different, not better or worse, simply different… and it is a fundamental moment to face the situation to follow. The information must be true, concise and must be transmitted with delicacy and understanding.
Children with special needs open their hearts to you and keep nothing for themselves. They are pure feeling in a body that perhaps does not respond to them. They are grateful, tremendously affectionate, they judge with the eyes of love and their silence is not uncomfortable. It is the silence of calm and reflection.
Many times they need more hospitals and rehabilitation centers in a few months than we need in a lifetime. They don't deserve a look of compassion, because they have nothing to be pitied for. They give us a lesson in struggle and life at any time. Pure and beautiful, undoubtedly healing.
Integration with peers and society
Depending on the problem, these children have fewer or more difficulties in adapting to the environment in which they live. Unfortunately, people who "a priori" have no intellectual disabilities behave towards these children by showing hatred, compassionate looks and sorrow for what they face.
Moreover, they allow themselves to make even more negative comments: "Poor thing, I feel sorry for you", "This thing has happened to you and it is not right", "God knows why He does things". The ignorance that people of this kind transmit must hurt.
These people must be removed from the life of the child and the parents, they must be ignored as they deserve. Most people are good, polite and respectful towards these situations, so don't give too much importance to those who don't deserve it.
People who care about the baby need the situation to be dealt with naturally, as a developmental problem that can be kept under control with the help of the best professionals and all those who love to see the baby smile like nothing else in life. .
We must fight for all children to integrate and get along well in the park, at school, in any place, eliminating any architectural barrier.. Because a little justice and a loving environment can work wonders for children and keep them happy most of the day.
Family, companions, professionals and friends ask for nothing more ... if a child is happy in any circumstance, what more could he ask for?