Last update: June 15, 2016
When we are faced with a problem, or a cluster of problems, the mental and physical exhaustion that derives from it can make us envelop in a cloud and make us think that that bad time will never pass and that we will never get out of it. But it can't rain forever: the knot will eventually unravel.
What is certain is that everything passes and that, apart from the problems beyond our reach, most of the issues that worry us and transmit anxiety and discomfort end up being resolved: remember that, if the problems multiply, even solutions can do the same.
A lump in my throat
We feel a weight on the chest, as if someone is putting pressure on it, and our stomachs are closed. The muscles of the esophagus contract, the throat becomes blocked and the mouth becomes dry. Problems lead us to experience episodes of anxiety, characterized by paralyzing symptoms.
“The traveler who crosses his mountain in the direction of a star, if he lets himself be too absorbed in his climbing problems, risks forgetting which star guides him”.
(Antoine de Saint-Exupéry)
In situations of strong emotional stress, the body reacts by becoming alert; it is a distressing feeling of discomfort that must be resolved. We find ourselves enveloped by the cloud we were talking about before and we cannot find a way out.
We do not all face difficulties the same way, but we all have stones along the way and worries that we would like to avoid. There are people who can handle obstacles more effectively and others who see the knots of life enormous, bigger than them. If you are part of this second group, we recommend that you read on.
To untie the knot, a process is required
Each knot is a way in itself and, what may seem simple from the outside, can be an abyss inside. Not everyone wears the same shoes and not everyone has the same level of endurance when walking. However, when we have a problem, we always have to go through a process in order to overcome it.
Tackling the knot that prevents us from moving forward requires four steps:
1) define exactly what happens to us;
2) be aware that courage is needed to find a solution;
3) consider the options available
4) strive to apply the best solution we have found and learn from it.
“Facing it, always facing it, this is the way to solve a problem. Facing it! ”.
(Joseph Conrad)
Any change requires calm and serenity; if we feel deprived of them, it is essential to look for them at all costs. Only in this way will we be able to see clearly which options we have available and which of these is the most advantageous in order to get out of the situation in which we find ourselves. The crucial and thorniest part of the process is the phase of analyzing the pros and cons of the possible solutions to be adopted.
When we untied the knot
All knots can unravel and untangle as we relax our body. To overcome the problem, one must first understand who is affected and in what way; after which, as we have already said, we can choose a solution and learn from the lived experience.
Every dark moment has a lesson to teach and pain is necessary to find an emotional balance: even if the problems lead us to think that all this evil will not help, in reality it will help us to understand that we are stronger than we believe. .
The most important thing, in addition to the lesson learned, is also to look at the knot from afar and realize that we have been able to untie it: when the problems leave us and we have solved them, they seem simpler, different, distant.
"At that moment most of my problems seemed complicated to me" - confessed his uncle. "But then the solutions found seemed simple enough."
(Spencer Johnson)
