Letting go means understanding that some people are part of our history

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Robert Maurer
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Letting go means understanding that some people are part of our history

Last update: October 29, 2016

Letting go means realizing that some people are part of our history, not our destiny. That's not to say it doesn't hurt. Farewells always hurt, even when they have long been obvious. This is one of the emotional laws that underpin our relational life.

There are relationships (or people) that seem strong but, no matter how much we struggle, how much we try to save what can be saved, how much we love, how much we ask to stay, at some point, with a breath, they simply disintegrate. Saying goodbye is not beautiful, but sometimes it is liberating, and it is in that sense of freedom that beauty and necessity lie.



Because it happens that we need to leave to be happy, to leave behind a life full of pain and anxiety, to abandon emotional uncertainty, to achieve inner peace and to become the architects of our emotional freedom.

“It is better to leave and leave a good memory than to insist and turn into a nuisance. What we have not had cannot be lost, what is not ours cannot remain with us and what does not want to remain cannot be attached to us ”.

It is better to say goodbye without leaving any words in abeyance

We must know how to say goodbye to the people who hurt us, considering that everything, from the first to the last thing, can serve as a lesson for future experiences. This is not to say that the sadness that sometimes leads us adrift is unjustified. Loving is beautiful and it is also good to learn from impossible relationships.


The great writer Gabriel García Márquez knew how to express these concepts very well. Below we propose an excerpt from one of his writings from which you can draw a great emotional teaching about the importance of loving with all your strength, even if this love certainly has a point that represents the final sentence.


If I knew that today is the last time I look at you as you fall asleep, I would hug you tightly and pray to the Lord to be able to be the guardian of your soul. If I knew that today is the last time I see you walk out the door, I would hug you, give you a kiss and call you again to give you more.

If I knew that today is the last time I hear your voice, I would record your every word to be able to hear them over and over again. If I knew these are the last minutes I see you, I would say "I love you" and I would not foolishly assume that you already know.

There is always a tomorrow and life gives us another chance to do things right, but if I am wrong and today is all we have left, I would love to tell you how much I love you, that I will never forget you.

Tomorrow is not insured for anyone, young or old. Today may be the last time you see who you love. So don't wait any longer, do it today, because if tomorrow didn't come, surely you would regret the day you didn't have time for a smile, a hug, a kiss and you were too busy to give one last wish.


Keep those you love close to you, say how much you need them, love them and treat them well, find the time to say "I'm sorry", "forgive me", "please", "thank you" and all the words of love that you know. Nobody will remember you for your secret thoughts.


If farewell hurts, open your eyes and learn your lesson

There is nothing sadder than a goodbye. Because an "a never again" has its weight. How long does a goodbye last? Loves, friendships and any other type of relationship have their duration and are based on the expression of feelings, emotions or thoughts.


It is important not to be left with the feeling that we have not said what we thought. Because goodbye is more painful if there are words left over. If we don't say them, they will dry out on our skin and ruin the way we express ourselves.

In other words, our emotional past determines our present. Therefore, it is important to manage our feelings, our emotions and our thoughts in a harmonious way with respect to the moment we are living.


Always remember: a goodbye hurts, but the most painful dismissals are those that are not pronounced, those that leave unanswered questions, locked up in a golden casket studded with thorns that can hurt our heart.

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