Years of school education, but we don't know how to love each other

Years of school education, but we don't know how to love each other

Years of school education, but we don't know how to love each other

Last update: April 19, 2016

Uncertain. Unsuitable. Hyperactive. With little motivation. Cheeky. There are many, many labels that our children receive during their school education. On the other hand, there are few glances that stop to understand what emotion is hidden behind each difficult pupil.

It is curious that in business or political environments, Emotional Intelligence is considered essential and structural for every professional, while the Educational Institutions, backward on this front, they don't consider it a skill to be enhanced.



School education must give us skills that enable us to manage on our own; it is useless to train children suitable for science or literature if we do not first teach them what self-esteem, respect or empathy is.

The burden of cognitive abilities continues to be essential for the school system. Emotions, on the other hand, are seen as a "taboo" which is best limited to the private sphere, in the solitude of every child intent on knowing himself in an increasingly complex world.

A school education that forms minds, but not people

Today's children and adolescents are skilled strategists of new technologies. The emoticons in their text messages are often the only approach to the world of emotions. However, when they move away from their cell phones, they are unable to handle or prevent situations such as bullying, for example.

Begoña Ibarrola, psychologist and researcher, tells us that in institutions that have integrated emotional intelligence in the classroom and in the school curriculum, cases of bullying have disappeared and academic performance has significantly improved. She is good luck, no doubt.


School education aims to train people who will change the world tomorrow: we educate, therefore, happy people, capable of being cheerful, intelligent in respect and brilliant in hope.


If we now ask ourselves why this transformation so necessary for our education is not initiated, we must consider the following aspects and reflect for a moment:

  • The drafting of the programs is in many cases determined by a political trend, and each chooses the curriculum that it considers most appropriate.
  • The weight of the cognitive factor continues to be very ingrained in our school system, notwithstanding theories such as "Gardner's multiple intelligences" indicate a clear need to work on Emotional Intelligence of children early.

We also need to consider that any institutional change takes time. A clear social awareness is necessary, because investing in emotions means investing in coexistence, in learning to be more inclined to human relationships, to respect and to that different point of view in which the need to educate perfect children is left aside to form happy people.

  • Gratitude, reciprocity, secure attachment and emotional communication are pillars that will allow the child to grow in freedom and maturity.
    • If you want to give birth to a child capable of respecting others, listening and using affection before aggression, be a model.. Keep your words, judgments and actions at bay; be the best example of him.

    The school: a microcosm of the social context

    The school for the child will represent a clear example of that world with which he will have to face tomorrow. Relationships with his peers and with authoritarian figures (teachers and professors) will help him acquire new and important skills.


    • It has been shown that in institutions where emotionally healthy habits and tools are adopted, children are very receptive to such knowledge.
    • They assimilate them day after day because they see that they are functional, that they are useful strategies with which they can improve their relationships and be more assertive when it comes to preventing attacks or making friends.
    • Emotional Intelligence is transformed into a habit capable of optimizing learning, to channel anxiety or nerves. All this leads to an improvement in academic results and a strengthening of the personality. A truly encouraging figure.

    Educating means learning to leave an imprint in the hearts of children


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