Last update: December 22, 2014
Unrequited love is a normal thing, it has happened to everyone sometimes: being attracted to people who are not suitable for us or who do not reciprocate our feelings. What we would like to communicate in this article is that it is wrong to see unrequited love as a consequence of something wrong with you; it has nothing to do with what you are worth.
Every day it happens to see people in love with someone who cannot reciprocate, it is as if we lived an epidemic of pathological love and the worst part is that we do not realize that it is a problem and that we should be interested in people who are more suited to us. Many times behind the phrase "nobody ever wants me, what bad luck!" hides the fear of commitment, which leads us unconsciously to please people who cannot stay with us because they are engaged, married, because of the difference in age, etc ..
By falling in love with someone who is not compatible with us, we do not run the risk of committing ourselves. Many people, without realizing it, depend on a platonic love for which the person in question is content to be a friend of the person he loves, even if he can never get anything more; you live on illusions, without realizing that what should be done is to break contacts and get to know other people, so as not to stagnate in an impossible relationship.
Love is pure chemistry
Have you ever stopped to think about what makes people fall in love? For sure you have met several beautiful and fascinating people, but without knowing why you have never felt attracted to them, or, on the contrary, maybe at times you have met someone who was not particularly beautiful, but had something you liked. Love is difficult to rationalize, it depends neither on beauty, nor on the type of work, nor on the cultural or economic level; it depends more on the chemistry and emotions that are triggered when dealing with a person. Unrequited love, therefore, must not undermine your self-esteem. Chemistry has no explanation, it is activated with some people and not with others.
4 tips to stop suffering for love
1. Take the bull by the horns: when you have strong feelings for someone, don't take it for long. If you establish a friendship, sometimes even a long-term one, with someone you are in love with, it will not do you any good. The more time you spend like this, the worse it will be. You will suffer less if you have the courage to face the situation and tell the person what you feel. In this way you will have immediately clear the situation and if the person in question does not correspond to your feelings, he means that he was not the right person for you and that he was preventing you from getting to know other people.
2. Love must not make people suffer: if you're dating someone who makes you suffer more than laugh, it's time to see if it's really worth it. Healthy love does not hurt, healthy love receives as well as gives. Couples are formed to increase happiness, not to sabotage it.
3. Keep your feet on the ground: stop dreaming of platonic loves, be realistic and if you can't be with someone, don't insist and move on. Learn to focus on real and achievable things and get to know new people who may interest you as a partner; maybe something could be born from a friendship and you already have the right person in front of you.
4. Don't allow uncertainties: many people ask for time and space to clear their minds. Don't give too much room to uncertainty, usually those who need a lot of time to clear their minds are because they are not really in love; this is not always the case, but regardless of the reason that leads someone to move away, they will have to respect the other person and give them a clear answer in a short time. Do not allow anyone to play with your life and your time, be respected. Eliminate the need for a partner to be happy, the best opportunities arise when a person feels good about himself while being single.