I often explain that to be happy you have to love.
And so many tell me they love, probably too much, and even though they give so much they receive nothing in return and in the end they feel emptied.
So I understood two things.
The first is that you don't love too much.
If you love, love is never too much.
Do you know how much you think you loved too much?
When you don't get enough in return.
To love too much? It never happens!
If you gave 100, but got 100, would you think you love too much?
I say no.
Sure, you'd be giving it all, but getting the same back, you wouldn't think it's too much.
But even if you only loved 20 and the one you love gave you back 5 then you would start thinking that you love too much.
Yet you "love less" than before, how could it be too much?
Because that "too much" depends on which meter you use to measure it: too much for what?
Too much compared to whom?
The right answer is that you love too much for what you get in return.
Compared to who you are loving, who does not give you the same.
When I created the course "Love without being used”(You can find it on this page ⇒), in one of the lessons I explain when we feel used.
To feel used, there must be an imbalance between what I give and what I receive.
In practice I feel used, I think I love too much, if I see that there is a lack of equity between what I am giving and what I am receiving.
At least from my point of view, because it could also be that the other is giving the maximum he is capable of.
But it is not enough for me and I feel that this "is not right".
There is only one small problem at this point: Do you love for love or to receive something in return from the people you say you love?
Indeed either you love without asking for anything, or you are not loving at all.
Whether we like it or not, the reality is this (if you have doubts, read this page ⇒).
The second thing I realized is that the balance it is essential.
It is no coincidence that I told you that we feel we are being used if there is less balance in the relationship.
But how can there be balance if you give and receive nothing?
There is, if you look closer.
If I love you and I give it all, and I love myself and I give it all, then they are in balance.
Everything I give to you, I give it to me too.
And it doesn't matter what you do, in my balance.
If you love giving everything e love yourself at the same time, you will be in balance.
And the interesting thing is this: if you love me and you don't love me, you're not really loving me either, what you say you love.
In the end you love if you give everything without asking for anything and only if this love is as much for others as it is for you.
Here is theequilibrium from which you never get tired to love and for whom you no longer think that you "loved too much".