Growing up is difficult. Chances are you've heard this phrase repeated on more than one occasion or it even came out of your mouth. When you began your journey into adulthood, you felt that it was difficult to adjust to the adult world, but now that you are a part of that universe, if you look back, you will probably feel some indifference.
When a child or teenager complains that school is difficult, it will first remind you of the confusion you felt at their age, but then the feeling of indifference will invade you. The same happens when you see a child who wants a new toy with all his might and eventually gets it: you can no longer identify with that infantile emotion, even if you have experienced it in the past.
That indifference moves towards many areas of life, closing our eyes on the incredible miracle that represents the world around us. Psychological maturity implies that we abandon our way of looking at things as children. We take adulthood as a destiny, and when we reach it we expect to free ourselves from childhood optimism, sensitivity and curiosity. As a result, we wear a layer of indifference that not only isolates us from the world but also from ourselves.
From a curious child to an indifferent adult
Children think and act instantly, they are almost always fully present. They don't care much about what other people think because a large part of their mind is occupied with fun and imagination. Smaller things, like a flower, can be extremely interesting because they arouse their curiosity.
However, as we grow, the idea of self-control is taking over our minds. They teach us to focus more on ourselves and judge our actions or decisions based on the results obtained, not based on the pleasure and satisfaction they give us. Society tells us that we must be aware of how others perceive us, it tells us that if we want to be accepted, we must behave like adults.
So, that wonderful flower becomes just a flower. The magic disappears and our curiosity dies. In their place indifference and apathy are established.
As we become adults, we limit ourselves more than ever. A child's mind does not know many things, but it remains open to everything. The adult mind knows some things, but it is closed to almost everything. Responsibilities take center stage and our dreams and interests stop being a priority.
Worst of all, we don't even question how we prioritize ourselves based on what society classifies as "normal". We become indifferent to the person we used to be and pay no attention to the endless possibilities that stray from the norm. Then we disconnect from our essence, so it is not strange that we end up feeling overwhelmed, stressed, distant ...
But we don't even stop at that moment, because society requires us not to stop, because it is a waste of time, a useless distraction. We are convinced that this is the way of thinking and acting as adults, that it is the "right" way to do things.
As a result, we end up living on autopilot always on. We stop growing, experimenting, discovering, feeling real curiosity, longing for something… We join the masses and live evenly, according to what is expected of us.
Growing up is necessary, being indifferent is optional
Indifference is the tombstone of personal development, but growing up doesn't necessarily mean becoming indifferent. The secret is to replace judgments with curiosity so we can reconnect with our inner child.
It is important that we begin to wonder why we consider something we would really like to do as "strange" or "embarrassing". We will find that we contain ourselves because we fear the judgment of others. At some point someone told us, or hinted at us, that these things were weird or embarrassing. So we assume his worldview, without realizing that it doesn't necessarily have to be ours as well.
What benefits would you get by changing this perception? Would you feel freer or more authentic?
When you allow your mind to open up to all possibilities and reconnect with your dreams, you find that many of the reasons adults are not really that "reasonable". Then indifference gives way to curiosity and sensitivity. It is a journey back to the past that is worth taking.