Blockages often lead to postpone training courses, studies and even to make us miss out on precious opportunities. But all this can change ...
Last update: 04 November 2019
Feeling stuck is a very unpleasant feeling. Imagine you are at a crossroads and have three roads ahead of you. While having more than one option available and knowing, in a sense, which is the favorite, remain immobile. So the days, weeks, months and even years go by. For some reason unknown to us, we are unable to overcome a limiting block.
It is something that many - if not all - have already experienced at least once in their life. And maybe even more than one. This feeling tends to appear in the absence of goals and objectives. The days go by all the same and gray and this can cause severe anguish. We keep turning around and we can't get over the block in question and get out of the situation.
The feeling of swimming in mud
Psychologist Judith Duque Camargo, in a recent article on Carl Rogers, collected the testimonies of some patients about their feeling of blockage. One of them says: «Before I had certainties […] today I only move mechanically. My world has shrunk to what surrounds me ». Another patient says «I gave everything to my husband, even his children, I didn't want to, but I accepted. And now I feel alone, my life has no meaning, I am old and I have no more opportunities… ».
It is as if they were swimming in a pool full of mud, from which - as much as they try to find solutions - they cannot get out. This is what happens when you feel stuck. You can't see beyond it and it's like having lost all hope. Often this depends on certain beliefs that we carry over from the past or on fears that prevent us from moving forward.
When work does not gratify us or we do not dedicate ourselves to our passions (traveling, learning a language, moving house, being independent) our fears and insecurities can lead us to resign ourselves to the fact that things can only go this way. However, the boredom and hatred of the days that go by without meaning risk becoming too high a price to pay.
Some strategies to overcome a block
If we think we have been blocked for too long - usually the time frame taken as a reference corresponds to six months - it is essential seek the help of a professional. However, there are some ways to deal with the situation when it appears at specific times.
- Take a break: perhaps we have never stopped or given permission to take time for ourselves to think about what we really want. If we don't, it becomes more difficult to make decisions, confining us to doubt and the feeling of consuming our days.
- Finding the stimuli: at the origin of our choices there is always a reason. But the routine, the lack of motivation and the acquired habits made us forget it. We try to remember the reasons for our choices. If we don't feel fulfilled in what we do or if we see ourselves different, it may be time to change our path.
- Find inspiration: we could make contacts with people who inspire us, read books, watch documentaries or start new activities. Inspiration must be sought and is one of the strategies to overcome a block.
"When inspiration does not find me, I go to meet it to find it."
An exercise in visualization
This visualization exercise is done by some practitioners in sessions and is essential for fighting blockages. It allows us to become aware of what we want, helping us to understand the steps to take to succeed. The exercise is performed as follows:
We begin by relaxing, closing our eyes and breathing deeply. After that, let's visualize ourselves in front of a door that we will open. Behind the door is our future self. Let's try to understand how old she is; maybe 60, 70 or 90 years. For each person it will be a different age.
If we visualize our 70-year-old ego and in reality we are 25, we begin to retrace all ages. We will first visualize 30 years and continue ten by ten until we reach 70.
For each of these life stages let us ask ourselves what do we do, where we live, what work do we do, if we have children, etc. In addition, we check if we have a partner, what are our friendships and the relationship with our family. The exercise will end by visualizing a hug between us and our XNUMX-year-old self.
This exercise is to give us an idea of what we would like to do. For example, if we visualize ourselves on trips around the world or as employees of a company we have never worked for, it can help us make decisions in the present. Maybe by signing up for a training course related to the job we would like to do or saving for the next trip.
Get over a block with action
Regardless of what we decide to do to overcome our blockages, the important thing is to take action. We must avoid being immersed in our own mind, in a sea of doubts and without ever touching the ground. You have to start taking steps, perhaps small ones, to get closer and closer to your goals.
Blockages often lead to postponing courses, studies and even making us miss out on precious opportunities. But all of this can change. Facing fears and starting to change the little things with the help of a professional will allow us to feel that we are truly advancing and that we are leaving that area where we were sinking.