Making love with your eyes closed: why does it happen?

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Joe Dispenza
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Making love with your eyes closed: why does it happen?

The gaze between two people is a powerful communicative weapon; in a romantic situation it has an important expressive function. However, in moments of intimacy, stares seem to be uncomfortable more than they do anything to the relationship. Why does this happen?

Last update: Augusts 16, 2022

A look is said to trigger passion and to be one of the clearest indicators of interest in the other person, the twinkle in the eye reveals emotions. Nevertheless, it is common to make love with your eyes closed.



In moments of intimacy, the eyes are closed by instinct instead of finding a connection through the gaze. What could be the cause of this hypothetical contradiction? Besides, why is it so common to make love with your eyes closed?

The gaze is one of the most ancestral mechanisms of emotional communication. Almost all of us agree that, at times, the look can say more than a thousand words; in fact, they sometimes act as a revealing gesture, offering forgiveness and counsel.

From an evolutionary point of view, the eyes and the gaze have acquired functions that go far beyond the pure organicity for which they were created by nature.

Like the airways, which allow us to breathe and which then made language possible, the eyes, whose primary function is to give us sight, later became part of the expressiveness of the face.

Look at each other romantically

In fact, we know that two people who love each other are much more inclined to look directly into each other's eyes and hold the gaze for a long time, than two people who have a lustful interest in each other.


Apparently, looking at oneself is synonymous with romance, while doing it for sexual purposes could be perceived as something weird. Although it is true that the gaze can acquire a fundamental meaning in the sexual sphere for many people: it affects sexual arousal as much as it affects the culmination of the erotic act.


Would we be able to arouse ourselves in the same way if we were unable to see the person with whom we are in company and if touch were our only tool towards gratification?

Making love with your eyes closed, what does it mean?

In an era in which sexuality has reached hitherto unknown heights and in which we are surrounded by sexual messages of all kinds and intensities, it seems that the power that, in sexual terms, can acquire a glance, is beginning to take shape, the view

Well, love with your eyes closed, in which you are accomplices, can be a malleable strategy to give greater intensity to a sexual encounter. That is why the fantasy of many is to blindfold the sexual partner's eyes.

There are several reasons why many people prefer to have sex with their eyes closed. Are the following:

  • Don't get in the habit of doing this.
  • Thinking that opening your eyes can be distracting and prevent you from living the moment intensely. 
  • Feeling too exposed or thinking the other person might feel that way.
  • Being convinced that capturing your partner visually for a few moments is enough and, at the same time, more erotic than just staring.
  • Prefer other senses (touch, hearing, smell, etc.), because they are considered more erogenous.

Yet, during a passionate sexual act, we often keep our eyes closed, while when we have a slower and more peaceful relationship, we tend to do the opposite and a greater exchange of glances takes place. For what reason?


Why make love with your eyes closed?

The explanation is perhaps simpler and more intuitive than one might imagine: both in romantic relationships and in naked and raw sex, fantasy is a fundamental and ancestral element.



In the first case it would be a question of fantasies whose authenticity and correspondence with reality is easily understandable; in the second, fantasy it does not know these limits and allows a greater expansion and richness of contents.

This means that fantasizing while keeping our gaze fixed on the other person helps us to outline future thoughts that fuel the desire to share an emotional relationship with that person.

But that fantasy remains in our imagination, since it is actually based on a physical and immutable reality that lies before us.

However, daydreaming with our eyes closed while experiencing the passion of a sexual encounter allows us to take the imagination beyond much wider and more exciting boundaries.


On the other hand, some sexologists claim that making love with your eyes closed increases pleasure and sexual desire, because it stimulates the other senses.

Since closing your eyes during sexual intercourse is a personal choice and has a different meaning and erotic content for each of us, the advice is not to worry.

Live in the moment and make sexual intercourse an unforgettable experience instead of worrying about whether having sex with your eyes closed is right or not.

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