Last update: April 09, 2016
If we were to map out feelings and situations, we would realize that for many people the line between loneliness and sadness is very thin. This closeness is not only relative to loneliness per se, rather habitual is also the feeling of pain for someone we perceive as distant.
However, nothing is further from reality. Loneliness becomes a burden only when it is imposed, when the person who feels without social support wants it and can't find a way to get it. This loneliness has a lot to do with the need to confide, to talk and tell part of our story.
For this reason, it is such a detrimental feeling for older people, who feel they have accumulated a wisdom that they need to pass on in some way. For that reason, they are so grateful when we simply give them time. This happens, because the sadness that accompanies the imposed loneliness also has a lot to do with time and with the feeling that, perhaps, we are not sufficiently appreciated for someone to dedicate to us.
A completely different story is, however, the chosen loneliness, the need to be able to escape the social noise. The eagerness to find a distance that gives clarity, as if our eyes were clouded up close. This type of loneliness makes us independent and gives us the resources to be able to feel pleasure and feel full, depending solely and exclusively on ourselves.
"Loneliness is the lot of all high spirits."
-Arthur Schopenhauer-
Loneliness: you can do what you want and when you want it
If you are one of those who love loneliness and live alone, it is likely that you are used to being the person you care most about.. Perhaps right now you are weighing the advantages of solitude with those that coexistence would offer.
In the latter situation, you certainly put aside the choice of your programs, not having to give explanations or be able to make instant decisions; in the other, the security that it would give you to have unconditional support, the need for well-being that comes from sharing or the fact of being able to delegate some of the household responsibilities.
There are people for whom such daily loneliness will be a transitory situation and others who will choose it for life. Whether you are from one party or the other, the best thing is that your situation comes from a choice, not from having to adapt because you don't have the opportunity to live otherwise.
You can love yourself instead of anyone
They say that loneliness helps you grow as a person and get to know each other. However, keep in mind that this will not be the case if you indulge in the frustration of not being able to get rid of it or, if you start obsessively looking for a way to escape even if it were a lion in the savannah.
Why do we generally shy away from loneliness? Because there are very few who find company with themselves. "
-Carlo Dossi-
If you can support yourself, appreciate yourself, accept your virtues and defects, ultimately love yourself, you will be on the right path to seek true happiness., as you will not depend on whether or not you are in a romantic relationship to achieve it. The perfect relationship must be the one you have with yourself. Do not forget that those you build with others will originate from it.
Cultivate good friendships
Who said that loneliness is synonymous with isolation or not having friends? Nothing further from reality! Loneliness is the ability of everyone to live in their own way and this is absolutely not in contrast with having good friends. that they understand you, love you, respect your way of life and make you happy.
When you decide to be alone, you give yourself the opportunity to meet new people, thanks to the fact that you dedicate yourself to new activities without company. People who share your tastes and who will undoubtedly enrich your life. They will be part of that new air that will permeate your existence, they will be those who will stimulate you to put aside those relationships that you cling to only for fear of being alone.
