Languages ​​of love according to Gary Chapman

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Robert Maurer

Languages ​​of love according to Gary Chapman

Last update: February 07, 2018

We all know that love has a thousand ways to express itself, and perhaps we have known someone who expressed his love in a different way than ours. Sometimes we also meet people who seem not to love; this is not the case, they simply use one of the different languages ​​of love or a form unknown to us.

Love, like language, has many shades. This is why Gary Chapman, in 1995, dedicated himself to describing the 5 languages ​​of love that he believed could exist, in the way of expressing and receiving it.

Each of us usually has two types of language with which we feel most comfortable expressing ourselves and with which we better understand the love that comes to us from the outside. Perhaps we express love in one language, but we prefer another to receive it. The 5 languages ​​of love described by this author are the following.

The 5 languages ​​of love according to Gary Chapman

1. Physical contact

Physical contact is one of the easiest languages ​​to communicate love, as it doesn't need words. People who prefer this language love caresses, hugs and feel comforted in the arms of others or holding hands. When physical contact is the predominant language, babies feel better when picked up, enjoy massages, or sit on others' lap.

Older children (especially boys between 7 and 9 years old) who appreciate this form of love, can express it in a unique way, with quarrels, wrestling, football, basketball, but it is still the physical contact that makes them feel loved.

2. Words of affirmation

One of the languages ​​of love attaches great importance to words. Some people need words of affection, praise, calm through good speech, motivation through well-written snippets. Their way of expressing themselves will be more defined with love letters, in which they feel free to express their feelings through words.

Words have incredible power over us and influence our behavior even when they appear only fleetingly. Being aware of the power of words allows us to create a new world to express and receive love and affection.

Quality time

Dedicating time to the people we love is a way to express how we feel about them. Look for quality time in our agendas, complete and full, to dedicate body and soul to the person who accompanies us. We need to stop giving so much importance to what to do and make the people we do it with more important.


There are people who love to receive and give gifts, they don't necessarily have to be material objects or objects with a high economic value. For them, the time spent thinking about what to give, the love with which it is given and the opportunity to get to know the person better through the details will be relevant. The gift will be a way to express love for each other, but never an end to get something.

Acts of service

In this context, the acts or tasks that the person performs as a means of communicating what they feel are described. The examples that can come to mind are different: preparing food with love, taking care of the house in which you live, taking care of the other person when he is sick. They are simple acts, but they show interest in the other.

Once you know the five languages ​​of love described by Gary Chapman, it may be easier to see that love is not always expressed in the same way, that there are different languages ​​of love and that knowing them opens the doors to knowledge, allows you to love. with more letters and with more worlds.

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