JOMO, the joy of missing something

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Joe Dispenza

JOMO, the joy of missing something

The first step in developing the JOMO mindset is to accept reality for what it is.

Last update: May 23, 2019

Perhaps you have already heard of FOMO, the English acronym for fear of missing out, or the fear of missing out on something important, especially in relation to social interactions. But did you know that the opposite term also exists? In this case we are talking about JOMO, or joy of missing out, an expression still little known, but which refers to an increasingly growing phenomenon.

Unlike the fear of missing out, people who experience JOMO are happy to miss that (theoretically) important something. In today's article we will see exactly what this choice consists of and what are the assumptions that lead to embrace it.

What exactly is meant by JOMO?

The English expression that responds to the acronym of JOMO can be translated into Italian as "joy of missing something". Strange as it may seem, more and more people say they are happy that they don't want to experience things they theoretically should. But what is the reason that led to the birth of this concept in our culture? What drives so many people to recognize themselves in it?

The idea of ​​JOMO is to be a sort of antidote to the fear of missing out. The people who developed it say that always thinking about what they were missing made them feel worse. For this reason, they decided to invent a new word that allowed them, in a certain sense, not to always have to keep an eye on the “passing trains”.

In an interconnected world like ours, you can always find better than what you are already doing. With a couple of clicks we can log into our social networks and find people who seem to be doing better than us. Because of this, many feel that they spend more time wishing to do something interesting than actually enjoying real experiences.

The JOMO was born precisely as a reaction to this sensation. Its supporters believe that, while it is true that it is always possible to find something better, all the situations we experience in life are still able to transmit something to us. This idea is influenced by disciplines such as mindfulness and acceptance and commitment therapy.

Those who manage to develop the joy of missing something have the possibility of living the present moment more easily and fully. Succeeding makes activities easier, like hanging out with friends, watching a show, or just relaxing, as enjoyable as the best of adventures.

How to develop the JOMO mentality?

Missing something "important" it can also help improve mood. Below you will find the strategies to put into practice to adopt this mindset in your life.

1- Accept the reality

The first thing to do to start enjoying losing the endless opportunities / experiences is to understand that you cannot be in two places at the same time. There are simply too many places to see, foods to try and activities to do. If we try to experience everything, the only thing we will get is the frustration of not succeeding.

The first step in developing the JOMO mindset is, therefore, to accept reality for what it is. This idea is central to a large number of philosophies, psychological currents and even religions. For example, it is the basis of Stoicism. But if the concept of accepting what happens to us has maintained its importance over time, it is probably precisely because it is actually a useful way of thinking.

2- Find out what is really important to you

After realizing that you can't try everything, the next step is to decide what you really want to try. In this case, it can be useful to create a list of objectives and interests to be written in order of priority. What are the most important experiences for you? If you were to eliminate any of your habits, which would you cancel first?

Note: this is a personal exercise. It doesn't matter what others think and want. If you really want to develop the JOMO mindset, you will have to do an exercise in honesty and look within.

3- Learn to say no

The last step in acquiring the JOMO mindset may seem obvious, but for this very reason we often forget or omit it. We refer to the ability to say no when you don't want to or can't accept a commitment.

Out of fear of what others think, out of embarrassment or low self-esteem, we often find ourselves involved in situations that we don't like at all. Obviously, eliminating this course of action is essential to start focusing on what really matters to you.

As you learn to value your choices, it will be easier to say "no" to everything else. However, you will often find yourself working on your ability to set limits. Thankfully, there are a variety of resources you can access to improve your assertiveness.

Developing the JOMO mindset can turn into one of the best choices for your well-being. With the advice we have proposed in this article it will be even easier. But remember that there are hundreds of ways to learn to enjoy what you already have. You just have to find the ones that suit you best.

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