Impatience makes us live in a hurry, tastes like frustration and is often accompanied by anger and unhappiness. Living with impatient people is not easy, but there are strategies to manage this psychological condition.
Written and verified by the psychologist GetPersonalGrowth.
Last update: 15 November 2021
Impatient people abound. They are those individuals who are constantly frustrated, never satisfied. And when they are, their complacency is so brief that they need confirmation again. Few things feed negative emotions in this way like the difficulties of living together.
Many of us surely know someone who exhibits these characteristics. Perhaps we ourselves have an impatient temperament that is so difficult to control. What does it mean to live suspended in this emotional and psychological vortex? Definitely feel a deep state of anxiety and stress.
British writer John Ruskin argued that hope ceases to be happiness when it is accompanied by impatience. We are faced with a condition that reduces our well-being and somehow hinders our relationship with others. Learning to manage impatience will make us more peaceful people and will help us find our well-being.
"The common man, when he does something, tends to ruin it because he is in a hurry to finish it."
Impatient people: constant frustration as a way of life
There are those who argue that this condition affects an increasing number of people. Indeed, impatient people are constantly increasing. We see this in the younger generation who are unable to handle frustration. Our children and teenagers are looking for immediate answers (for example, likes on social networks) to satisfy their desire to be accepted.
The problem is much more complex than it may seem. A study conducted by the National University of Singapore analyzed more than 1158 students and provided us with interesting conclusions. Dr Xinh Zhang, co-author of the work, said there is a relationship between impatience and the inability to learn and develop social skills.
These subjects are not defined only by impulsiveness, by acting without thinking, but also by the impossibility of enjoying the here and now. Furthermore, they are people who allow themselves to be influenced by prejudices and who judge quickly without delving into the information available to them. This is because their attention span is very low and their thinking is rigid. In a mind where haste only rules, there is no room to consider other perspectives and learn new ways of seeing things.
Impatient people tend to have more problematic relationships, and living with a partner is often stormy. They want everything now. They have no respect or even that "emotional closeness" that allows you to connect with others with moderation and delicacy.
Impatience is not a lack of patience, but a lack of education
Impatience is actually a behavior that depends on our culture, the context in which we live and even our upbringing. Parents often fail to teach us the value of waiting or to manage times of distress in which immediate support is not received.
We have become people who get annoyed when the internet connection is slow, when someone does not immediately respond to our messages or when the light takes too long to turn green. Patience must be taught at home as well as at school. However, we must be the ones who put it into practice every day and put a stop to a society that always forces us to race.
Useful strategies for impatient people
Impatience can turn into patience if we learn to control our emotions and impulses. To achieve this, we must stop and reflect on possible strategies to manage it:
- In what situations does it appear? In what moments am I dominated by impatience? We need to stop and analyze situations that are beyond our control and awaken our most impatient side. For many, for example, it is driving or riding a car. For others, the education of a rebellious child or teenager. There are also those who are impatient in dealing with others.
- What triggers it? The second step is to identify the causes. For example: "I get impatient when I see my child slow to go to school in the morning." “I lose my patience when I find myself stuck in traffic”. "I am very impatient when I wait for the results of medical exams, university exams, etc, and this changes my mood".
- What do I do to manage impatience? At this point, we should all be aware of whether or not to apply a strategy to control impatience, and whether it is effective.
- Have a rational approach. A useful strategy to counter impatience is to have a rational approach. For example, if it makes me nervous to see that my child doesn't care about his responsibilities, I must try not to get angry with him. That way, I won't be in a bad mood and will avoid making things worse. I will have to be patient and reason with him to reach precise agreements.
- Full awareness. Finally, it is worth remembering that practices such as mindfulness are very useful strategies that impatient people can adopt to improve attention and manage emotions.
In conclusion, impatient people will always exist. And we too, under certain circumstances, may have a nervous and impulsive behavior. Taking note of this situation, we must know that there are methods and strategies to train patience and that will allow us to improve the quality of our life.