How to deal with uncompromising people

Who I am
Robert Maurer
@robertmaurer
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wikipedia.org

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You have been in line for more than an hour and when
your turn comes the clerk tells you he can't accept yours
request. You know that the problem is very simple and that if he wanted to
could fix it immediately in seconds. Then you ask him for
please do it. It still denies! You tell him your needs and he doesn't
moves. At this point you get angry and you miss the insults. So the employee,
who was already annoyed, loses his temper and asks you to leave.




The result?
You haven't solved your problem, after an hour in line, and you are
angry that you are probably about to break out. Unfortunately
these uncompromising people, "mentally closed" or rigid, we find them
everywhere every day. The world is full of people like that and they all end up with
make us agitated, so it is better to learn to deal with them. 1. Check your expectations: In
one occasion Sylvia Plath stated: “if
do not expect anything from anyone you will never feel disappointed ".
Obviously, this is exaggerated, but it is certain that if we expect people
intransigent put themselves in our place and understand us, probably
we will end up very disappointed. Finally, once we know who we are in
in front of an intransigent person the best thing to do is not to wait for us
to be able to convince her. 2. Control the emotions:
when we understand that our goals could collide with a wall
hard and impregnable it is normal to go in tension. However, the tension
generates more voltage. Take a deep breath, relax your face muscles and
only then do you speak. 3. Don't give too much information: A
speech that is too verbose does not normally convince intransigent people.
Better to stop for a minute and think about which of our arguments might
be more convincing and use it. When we offer too many reasons, these
they are often perceived as invented excuses to try to be convincing.
Clear and concise communication will be better. 4. Don't take it as something
staff
: the thought like "why me?" it won't solve anything. In fact, it is pier
many people are likely to be victims of uncompromising behavior.
During our life we ​​all have to face situations at one time or another
unpleasant, this should not be interpreted as a punishment, but as a further one
experience to learn from. 5. Point out uncompromising behavior:
sometimes pointing out to the person that he is too uncompromising in behavior,
it can help us break through the latter. The essential thing is to do it with a
language and a form of expression determined but not aggressive, doing
notice that this behavior is doing harm to you. In the end,
if these techniques don't work (which is very likely), the best solution
is forwarding our question to another person. Unfortunately, that's a lot
hard to get overly rigid people to change their minds, so that's when it is
possible it is always better to avoid them. 
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