Healing a broken heart

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Robert Maurer
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Healing a broken heart

We have all had a broken heart at some point in our life. However, many don't know how to heal it. We present some suggestions in this regard.

Last update: July 24, 2022

A pause is a momentary wound in the deepest self; a fracture that is imprinted in an instant of our life cycle, but which should not determine our future. Healing a broken heart is, in fact, possible.


The experience of losing something important it can occur in many situations and not just in relationships. Some may have fallen in love with someone who didn't love them back. Others have seen their relationship as a couple or friendship crumble.


There are those who say "no" to other stories, because after that lost love a new relationship no longer makes sense. This and other behaviors indicate that we don't want (or don't know) heal a broken heart.

The truth, however, is that we can always start from scratch. However, we must be willing to do it well and proceed in the correct way. If we lock ourselves in a bubble and make sadness our best friend, life falls the curtain and everything loses momentum, color, hope.

You have to work on boring and sick emotions, change focus, correct thoughts, improve self-esteem to heal a broken heart. It is a delicate task, but with positive results.

I will never find anyone like him / her

This thinking is universal and totally wrong. Logically, where there is love there is the belief that the person in question is unique in the world, that no one else will like us in the same way. Is a mistake.


As soon as time has run its course and after meeting new people, you will understand that there is a wide range of people and it is possible to find someone on your own wavelength.


No breakup, disappointment, rejection, or loss should put an end to emotional hope. Nobody deserves to be a slave to certain circumstances. Furthermore, adopting a stagnant mindset generates frustration and rigid thinking.

We must understand that life is change, it is movement, learning to take care of what you love, but also to let go of what can no longer be to bring in another twenty.

If we don't do anything to keep meeting more people, we won't be able to find others we might like.

How to heal a broken heart according to science

The emotional pain of a broken heart is unbearable. We remain immobilized, stuck and unable to think of anything other than the loved one.

As curious as it may seem to us, science says that in order to face a breakup, one must stop listening to the mind. We know that this suggestion is almost impossible to fulfill. However, at times like these the mind and its thoughts can be our worst enemy.

Lucy Brown, a neuroscientist at Einstein College of Medicine, New York, explains in many of her studies and articles that when dealing with a breakdown, loss or rejection, the brain works with other, more primitive neural systems. These are very similar to those that regulate the sense of hunger or thirst.


It is therefore very difficult to "turn off" that need, that continuous pain in the brain. The mind feeds on that pain and constantly remembers scenes, moments, words.

Even so, we can mitigate that pain, that suffering also that the brain interprets as real and equates it to a burn. Let's see some tips to heal a broken heart.

Heartbroken people report feelings of sadness, bitterness, disappointment, emptiness, pain.


1. Improve your self-concept

We know that love promotes our growth and enriches us. A breakup is above all a direct blow to the self-concept. We can make the mistake of blaming ourselves, of projecting delusions onto ourselves, or of seeing ourselves as empty entities without that person by our side.

The emotional consequences of these realities are immense. As explained in a study by Professor David A. Sbarra, of the Department of Psychology at the University of Arizona, following a breakup it is normal for self-esteem to drop and feel sadness and anger for weeks or months.

First of all, therefore, we must heal our identity and our self-concept. We need to rebuild our own being and focus all our efforts on ourselves.

2. Zero contact

It is important to make the decision to leave the memories behind in order to heal a broken heart. For this, it is necessary to respect the so-called zero contact. Do not look at photos, do not leave objects that remind you of your loved one, or contact you in any way, etc.

If we stay in touch with the person we like, we won't have eyes for anyone else. In light of this, it is extremely important to turn the page and make room for the new.


3. Keep busy to heal a broken heart

There is no better medicine than keeping the mind busy, especially by dedicating ourselves to our passions. It is forbidden to stay without doing anything, because theinactivity causes frustration. It is ideal to spend your time going out, playing sports, enrolling in a course, etc.

4. Meet new people

If we make new friends and meet people we have a good relationship with, we will realize that in life it is always possible to start from scratch. The best way is to start with social relationships.


5. Self-love

Taking care of yourself is a very important part of recovering from emotional pain. When the heart is in pain, there is more stress than necessary, therefore we must take care of ourselves more than ever by adopting a healthy life, a balanced diet, good rest with stable schedules and regular exercise.

6. Patience and acceptance to heal a broken heart

Everything in this life is temporary and the emotional pain is no less. Continue on your way even if your heart has been broken; keep walking, patiently, knowing that the pain will pass and accept the situation. After all, life is sometimes wonderful, sometimes painful.

The art of patience is key to healing a broken heart along with acceptance. Letting time pass while we manage what happened will help overcome it.

7. Seek help

When you feel deeply distressed, it is common to isolate yourself. However, this attitude only makes the situation worse.

Instead, the support from loved ones or trusted people. Their company and words of encouragement can be a powerful balm that helps heal a broken heart.

on your part, it is also beneficial to go to psychotherapy. In this case, a professional will provide the tools necessary to overcome the grief over the breakup and strengthen self-esteem.

Don't mask the pain

Many people are unable to cope with pain of a broken heart. Thus they take refuge in alcohol, drugs, inappropriate rhythms of life, unbalanced diets, etc.

These bad habits represent an escape from reality. In this way the pain will not heal, it will be masked. Not only will it persist, but other problems will add up.

The smartest way to heal a broken heart is to deal with emotional pain. Take care of yourself, accept the situation, open new doors and let the pain fade as the days go by.

More courageous is the one who decides to face heartbreak without harming oneself, rather than the one who resorts to an unhealthy life to mask the pain.

Anyone who can heal a broken heart resiliently and by accepting the negative situation, he will have learned an important life lesson that will contribute to his personal development and emotional strengthening.

Everything can have a positive reading, even the most painful of breakups has a lot to teach us. However, you have to be patient. Experiences are the basis of our learning and this is what distinguishes one from the other.

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