Getting over the breakup of a relationship

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Joe Dispenza

Getting over the breakup of a relationship

The breakup symbolizes a loss, a pain, an end, perhaps unexpected or at least unwanted, which leaves us insecure and alone in front of a future that at the moment we see uncertain.

Last update: 28 November 2018

What to do with the memories we have built? Where to keep that desire to try again? How to value the time we have dedicated to another person, who has been everything to us and who has now decided to leave. What to do with the love we still feel for her? How to overcome the end of a relationship, the end that we may have desired, but that came without warning?

Ending a relationship isn't pleasant at all, especially if we didn't make that decision. Memories, nostalgia and sadness begin to invade us and with them the questions. Without wanting to, we can fall into a spiral of inertia and malaise, almost a state of immobility in which nothingness is all we want. In these cases, getting over the breakup of a relationship seems impossible.

The breakup symbolizes a loss, a pain, an end, perhaps unexpected or at least unwanted, which leaves us insecure and alone in front of a future that at the moment we see uncertain.

The end of a love relationship is complicated for the person who has not decided it, but it is not impossible to overcome. Believing that we will never be happy again or that we will not meet anyone is common, but it is only doubts and insecurities resulting from the disappointment and suffering of the moment. They are also part of the process needed to heal emotional wounds.

What to do when the relationship comes to an end? The best option, even if it seems a contradiction, is to do nothing. That is to say, letting the process take its natural course. It is normal to take a break, a moment of reflection, and the ideal is to do it calmly and alone. Only in this way will it be possible to encourage adequate introspection, a sincere and sometimes painful look inside us.

Once we are connected with ourselves, the next step is open ourselves to the emotions we feel; anger, sadness, hate or whatever they are. The important thing is to listen to them and then let them go and receive the answers, while at the same time facing our fears. Well, all of this doesn't happen in two or three days or even in a week. It is a slow process that requires awareness and preparation, and the duration of which varies from person to person.

How to overcome the breakup of a relationship and what to do with memories?

What to do with everything we have experienced with the other person? Nothing. We don't have to do anything. The end of the relationship is part of the path we have to go through, but the memories belong to us. These are experiences that we must not miss because they are part of the person we are today. We will probably suffer at the beginning, because we believed it could never end, but they are there and over time we will come to give them the right space and reserve them the place they deserve. A box that once opened generates controlled and healthy emotions.

Sometimes we want to speed up the breaking process and seek immediate answers, but that can make us retreat rather than advance. We must allow the necessary time for the emotions to transform. If we let everything take its course, things could be resolved in less time. All this if it's not a troubled, suffocating or toxic relationship. When we give way to reason, we may realize that not everything was wonderful and that the end of the relationship was for the best.

Dedicating our time to someone who no longer loves us or who prefers not to share their time with us gives us the opportunity to spend time with ourselves, to get to know each other, to take care of us and perhaps to meet another person who wants our company. When the storm subsides and the emotions subside, when we learn to listen to ourselves and allow ourselves time and space, we realize that it is not the end, but the beginning of a new stage.

How long does the pain of ending a relationship last?

The duration of the pain caused by the end of a love relationship depends on the person. There is no predefined time or deadline, although whenever we commit ourselves not to think, not to remember, to do a thousand things to distract us and not be alone with ourselves or to repress the tears, we will always delay this moment a little. . Let's not forget that crying and being alone with yourself is essential to overcome the end of a relationship and heal, gather strength and recover again.

It's painful to say goodbye to someone we don't want to let go, but it's more painful to ask them to stay when they want to leave.

Time, along with the proper management of our emotions, will do everything possible to help us get through the end of the love relationship. However, if the state of apathy and sadness persists over time, the ideal is to consult a specialist.

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