Forget about a toxic person

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Robert Maurer

Forget about a toxic person

Last update: July 25, 2022

Everyone has been unable to stop thinking about another person's words or actions because of their emotional charge. When someone hurts us or our loved ones, the mind may be stuck on the event for longer than we would like. It is therefore possible to forget a toxic person, be it a partner, family member or friend, who belittles and hurts?

Words and actions can hurt not only when they are spoken or performed, but also days, weeks, or even months later. When that happens, it seems impossible to stop thinking about it and keep the memory alive. It happens, for example, to those who suddenly end the couple relationship.

Fortunately, however, we can learn to let go of these thoughts and get rid of the negative influence that unhealthy people can have in our life even several months after they leave it.

Having toxic thoughts

Toxic thoughts they are harmful on an emotional and physical level. Studies show that a person with negative thoughts tends not only to be more unhappy, but also to have worse health and are less able to cope with life's challenges.

Many researchers support this fact to the point that i toxic thoughts play a crucial role in diseases such as depression, cancer, heart disease and autoimmune diseases.

How to forget a toxic person

We work hard to eliminate everything toxic from our lives: we buy organic products, avoid unhealthy foods, smoking, etc. Even so, we invest very little effort in making the mind. Still, doing so can have a very positive impact on daily life.

An example of this is forget a toxic person who has caused us deep suffering. But how to do it? How can we forget that attitude or those words that have disappointed us and have affected our sensitivity? Why does this unpleasant memory show up all the time?

The Decalogue that we present below can be of great help to forget a toxic person and, thus, to pull out of the downward spiral of negative thoughts and emotions.

Choose one of the following strategies for get rid once and for all of the undesirable person who haunts your mind:

  • Talk less about that person and let more time pass. Not constantly mentioning the toxic person and waiting for time to pass will allow you to move on.
  • Wait and see what happens. We often feel the need to respond and react immediately to difficult people or situations. Rather, it would be better to wait and see what happens.
  • Eliminate the guilt. Thinking about past events and blaming yourself is not productive. Unpleasant events and misunderstandings follow one another like a domino effect. Typically, no person is entirely to blame for anything.
  • Don't try to get into other people's minds. It is impossible to know exactly what others think.
  • Tackle the bigger problem first. No matter what happened, the biggest problem we face is our anger. This creates a whirlwind of emotions that prevents you from responding in a useful and productive way. Keeping this emotion in check allows you to discover more effective ways to act and resolve conflicts with ease.
  • Keep calm. When faced with a situation in which we feel offended or hurt, it is crucial to keep emotions under control. Otherwise, it could cause even worse effects.

It's still…

  • Don't believe everything you think. When emotionally held hostage by worry, pain, fear, anxiety, or anger, the emotional and physical state you feel makes you see the discomfort as real, but it may not be. In this case, doubting your emotions can be a very useful strategy.
  • Don't pretend to be time wizards. When we think of past events that have hurt us, we often try to understand what we could have done differently to avoid an argument or an unpleasant outcome. This, however, is rarely productive.
  • To forgive. To forget a toxic person and get rid of suffering, forgiving yourself and others is the right way.
  • Changing mood. If none of the above techniques have been helpful, changing context and distracting yourself with more pleasant elements lowers the levels of discomfort and helps to deal with problems more effectively.
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