Find a reason to get up

Who I am
Robert Maurer

Find a reason to get up

Last update: July 31, 2015

The most beautiful people I have met are those who have known defeat, suffering, struggle, loss and have found a way out of the abyss. These people have a way of appreciating things, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that are filled with compassion, humility and a deep, loving restlessness. Beautiful people are not born out of nowhere.

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

We've all gone through moments where life seemed to get heavier and heavier on our shoulders.

We have certainly observed this phenomenon in others as well. We saw it in their faces, in their gestures, in their hands, in their pride, in the halo of suffering emanating from their souls..

In these moments, we have seen many people fall and give up, while others, on the contrary, always found a reason not to sink.

Because there are people who find within themselves a point of support and make it emerge with the shining smile of experienced players, those players who keep the best cards at the end, to tip the scales in their favor. Even if a few minutes earlier everyone gave them up for defeats, they do it. They get up.

These people are not particularly strong, they are not even the ones who keep their feelings to themselves or hide the pain. These people have one or more sincere reasons to love life.

These reasons respond to reasons or wishes that have to do with the purity of those who can summarize life in a few words. Reasons that push you to fight sincerely for life even when life plunges you into the abyss and getting out of it seems impossible and painful.

These people whisper a cry of hope that pierces temptation, a hidden devil who does not want to be abandoned or the deceptive peace of defeat. 

In these moments, these people, like everyone, feel that it is easier to close their eyes and let themselves fall. And then, they too want to let go with the hope that in the end there will be a water mattress on which to take refuge until they recover their strength.

Finding a foothold for many is a difficult undertaking. Think, for example, of a single mother with two children who gets unemployed and can't find work.

Certainly at the beginning he will look for work, also having illusions, illusions that have not yet been affected by the passage of time. However, if she does not find a job, she will stop deluding herself and will ask herself: "Why keep fighting every day if I then go back to bed with the same result I had when I got up?".

She will probably think of her children and that love will make its way into her that overcomes the mental limits in front of which, in other circumstances, she would have succumbed. She will feel that she has no other way out, another way, but she will never give up when two of the most important people in the world depend on her..

Curiously, in these situations, people develop a strange way of thinking, called "the gambler's fallacy". What does this false belief consist of?

The person acting under the effect of this reasoning thinks like a card player, convinced that, after experiencing several unfortunate situations, it is more likely that chance or luck will be on his side the next time around. It is precisely this false estimate of probability that keeps hope alive and keeps the person struggling.

On other occasions, we build a foothold by making many sacrifices. This happens when everything we have invested and built to get to that point becomes the very reason that does not allow us to give up..

In these cases, we are aware that long ago we made the decision not to consider another option, however bad things might go or how dangerous the path became.

In this sense, we think we have already evaluated the risk of the road we have taken and we are convinced that we have accepted it as our destination, whether it is the best of our life or the worst of our failures.

One way or another, those invisible, heartbreaking and sincere supports are the ones that comfort the cold-torn heart, even when the cold seems to reach the bones..

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