Expressing emotional pain: 5 strategies

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Robert Maurer
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Expressing emotional pain: 5 strategies

Last update: May 10, 2020

Expressing emotional pain is an unpopular habit. Although no human being escapes suffering, it has become common to reject it. Arms open for those who are "positive" and have "good energies". Eyes and ears close for sufferers, as pain seems to be a contagious disease.

The truth is that all human beings, sooner or later, suffer. Some more than others, but we all suffer at least once. Under these circumstances it is imperative to have the opportunity to express emotional pain. Suppress it it makes it stronger and prevents you from processing it.



"If it is not in your power to change a situation that creates pain, you can always devise the attitude with which to face this suffering."

-Viktor Frankl-

We often don't know how to express emotional pain, words are always insufficient and are not enough to mitigate suffering. For this reason we want to reveal some strategies that will allow you to more effectively manifest what you are feeling.

Strategies for expressing emotional pain

1. Say it out loud

While it may not seem like it, there is a big difference between thinking about pain and expressing it aloud. Thought is wrapped in words. We maintain a constant internal dialogue. However, this does not require greater order or precision in the ideas.

When we say things out loud, an interesting process occurs: the ideas they must be ordered so that the message is coherent and understandable. Even the facts must be presented in a concrete and precise way in order to be understood. That's why saying them out loud promotes catharsis. You don't even need to tell another person, just tell yourself. Maybe you can even register and listen again.



2. Learn to relieve tension with relaxing activities

Suffering causes emotional tension. A feeling of unease and discomfort that is difficult to get rid of. It is also possible to fall into states of extreme alertness or annoying numbness.

Nothing better than playing sports to eliminate some of this emotional overload. Physical activity changes our focus. It also activates the neuronal processes that induce a greater feeling of well-being.

3. Explain

We have become highly intolerant of the suffering of others. As a result, expressing emotional pain to others is sometimes very difficult. We don't want to disturb them or feel rejected. However, sometimes it is impossible, at least momentarily, to get rid of this mood quota.

The best thing in these cases is to explain to others what is happening to us. Let them see that you are going through a difficult time and that you cannot get out of it alone, that you have yet to process your feelings. This way others will have more elements of judgment to interpret your situation without leading to conflicts.

4. Avoid conflict 

Suffering generally also leads us to be more irritable and, at times, intolerant of the world. Sometimes we are tempted to channel our frustrations and discomforts into antagonism with others.

It is important to prevent this from happening, because it will add weight to the situation that already afflicts us. Here because the ideal is simply not to argue with anyone, for any topic. It is better to avoid confrontations.


5. Have a diary

A diary is a tool used since ancient times for several purposes. One of them is to express emotional pain. It also allows you to reorganize ideas when moving from thought to the language of the voice; in the written language there is also a new reorganization, deeper and more precise.


Writing is a channel for catharsis, but beyond that, it gives us a new perspective. When we read what we have written, we see things a little more from the outside. This helps to process emotions better and to see everything from a more rational perspective. Sometimes it also helps to give a creative outlet to suffering.

All of these means of expressing emotional pain are very valuable. Any option is better than keeping quiet, repressing, or being helpless in the face of pain. We must take it out, free it, with all the means available. Expressing it is the only way to process and overcome it.

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