Are there any exercises to improve our self-esteem? I know HW Beecher's and I assure you it's head and shoulders above any psycho-bale read so far.
"If you value yourself low, rest assured that the world will not raise the price."
Improve theesteem it is one of the fundamental stages of our personal growth path. If we don't believe in ourselves, how can we expect others to believe in us and in our projects?
While being aware of this ineluctable truth, we live in constant fear that others may not accept us; so we decide to conform to what we believe are the right things from say and do (... kiss, letter and will XD). But in the back of our little head a little voice keeps repeating that there is something damn wrong with all of this, that we must have the courage to be ourselves, that happiness is living a life that we really feel ours (I talk about it in my guide APP - Self-esteem step by step introducing the "Principle of Authenticity").
That little voice is our self-esteem. The weaker it is, the more we will tend to silence it, continuing to bow our heads in front of everything and everyone. The stronger it is, the more we will give it space in our thoughts, continuing to face everything and everyone head on.
A few weeks ago, I proposed to you 16 practical self-esteem strategies. In today's post I'd like to share a simple one with you exercise which, repeated daily, can help you give strength to that little voice. But to tell you about this exercise, I must first tell you a story ...
HW Beecher and the unforgettable lesson on self-esteem
Henry Ward Beecher chiii ?! I don't blame you if you've never heard of H.W. Beecher; in all honesty, I also discovered this character not earlier than a few months ago. Beecher was a prominent US politician, among the first to join the Hall of Fame for Great Americans. But a little history lesson aside, today I want to tell you an anecdote about Beecher's life, which I hope will help you to cultivate the self-confidence. Do we read it?
One day, the young Beecher was questioned by his literature teacher, who asked him to repeat in front of the whole class a poem he had explained during the previous lesson. Hesitant, but aware that he had studied hard, the young Beecher stood up in front of all his companions and began to repeat.
As soon as the time to pronounce the first stanzas of the poem, what aDO NOT'categorical, punctuated by the severe teacher, rang out within the walls of the classroom. Terrified, the young Beecher started all over again, but once again came the terrible 'DO NOT'. Humiliated, Henry stopped and sat back down with his eyes fixed on his desk.
Questioned by the teacher, a second boy, John, stood up to recite the same poem. Once again, as the boy started repeating, the teacher yelled a dry 'DO NOT'. Beecher's companion though he kept repeating, until the end of the poem. Once back to sit down, the teacher said satisfied: 'Very good!'.
Henry, irritated, protested to the teacher: 'That's not fair, I recited the same lines as John.'
The literature teacher, not at all surprised, replied to the young Beecher: 'It is not enough to know the lesson, Henry, you must be sure of your preparation. When you let me stop you, you did it because you weren't sure you were prepared enough. If the world screams at you 'No', it is your duty to answer'Yes', and prove your skills'.
Young Henry learned a lesson that day that accompanied him for the rest of his life and that made him one of the most important founding fathers of the United States of America.
When the world tells you 'No'
Over the course of your life, you will receive thousands of 'Nos'.
No! You can't do it!
No! You're wrong!
No! You are too old!
No! You are too young!
No! You are too weak!
No! It will never work!
No! You don't have the qualifications!
No! You don't have the experience!
No! You do not have enough money!
No! It can not be done!
Sometimes these 'No' will be yelled at you by your parents, by your teachers, by the whole world. Sometimes you will be the one to pronounce them in your mind. And each of these 'Nos' will erode a little of yours esteem, until you decide to give up, get back on the safe path and live the life ofaverage man. But there is an alternative ...
Your daily exercise to have steel self-esteem
Whenever the world screams at you 'No!', you answer him'Yes, and I will prove it!'.
"Yes, and I will prove it!"
This is also true when you repeat those 'No!' Yourself. Remember, each of those 'No!' makes you weaker. Learn, every day, to observe them, to recognize them for what they are and to send them back to the sender without any hesitation.
- No! You can't make yours dream. There is a crisis, it is not the right time, in Spain certain things cannot be done. To all these objections answer: 'Yes, and I will prove it!'. Prove it by committing to your goal every day. Prove it by facing the inevitable difficulties head on. Prove it today by lifting your butt off the chair, stopping procrastinating and applying the vacuum strategy. Remember:
"The dreams that remain in the drawer ... make the mold."
- No! You can not graduate. The Faculty you have chosen is too difficult for you, you have never had one study method, you are not good at university. To all these objections answer: 'Yes, and I will prove it!'. Prove it by making a serious effort to study. Prove this by presenting yourself in the classroom every day. Prove it by perfecting the best quick learning and memorization strategies, perhaps starting with cone technique.
- No! You cannot reach yours ideal weight. You have a constitution problem, in the family we are all like this, diets have momentary benefits, in the end you get back all the kg. Answer all these objections. 'Yes, and I will prove it!'. Prove it by respecting your body as you would respect the holiest of temples. Prove it by being aware of your diet. Prove it by starting the day by running for yourself before running for others.
- No! You can not learn english. You are too old, to speak fluently you have to spend thousands of euros on courses and stays abroad, you are not good at languages. To all these objections answer: 'Yes, and I will prove it!'. Prove this by learning at least 3 new words every day. Prove it by reading, watching and listening to English language material on a daily basis. Prove it ... by testing yourself with free test of YES! English ;-)
Maybe what you aspire to was in one of these examples, or maybe not. The truth is you can apply theexercise for Beecher's self-esteem in 1.000 different ways. What matters is to demonstrate, every day, to yourself and to others, what you are really capable of.
If you really want to regain your self-confidence, forget about over-the-top technicalities or blow-up behavior. This is a point on which I insist a lot within APP - Self-esteem step by step: self-esteem feeds on daily practice. We go back to believing in ourselves when we do what we set out to do.
This week, today, as soon as you have finished reading the post, close the browser, turn off your smartphone and tablet, think briefly about that goal you want to achieve more than anything else, think about the difficulties you have faced so far, at all 'No' they were thrown at you and then say these simple words in your mind: 'Yes, and I will prove it'.