Whether they are boyfriends, companions or husbands, little changes. They eat quietly, in front of our painful choice to stay on a diet! How can we get them to help us? First let's ask ourselves because we want to lose weight: for health, to please him more, to conquer a new image, to feel better about ourselves? They are very different reasons. Which can have a strong impact on our relationship as a couple, as well as on that with food.
Maybe we believe we need to lose weight to be more wanted by him, to improve (or strengthen) our relationship. It is a myth to dispel: if he has chosen you, he probably wants you as you are. So not only does he not care about your new diet, but, absurdly, he would even like to boycott it. Or he might be jealous. And fear that, with a lean physique, you may become more attractive in the eyes of others. Or, again, it might just be selfish: the important thing is that he is fine, and he cares little about your "fixed" with the line.
To make you support, you can field different strategies: convince him, involve him and, at the limit, fight him. If he doesn't want you to lose weight, because he likes you as you are, he fears losing you (or thinks that sooner or later you will only offer tasteless dishes) insist that your goal is not (only) to lose weight but to learn to eat better. It is true that, usually, the word diet is associated with poor dishes and minimal doses, but you show him that it is not true.
In our magazine (and on our website) you will find delicious recipes with minimal calories! Learn to juggle in the kitchen and offer him, whenever you can, tasty light dishes. You will be able to eat good and tasty food with him, without having to limit yourself and at the same time satisfying his palate. Or involve him in finding the best foods for your health, without placing excessive emphasis on weight loss. The occasion of a check-up could give you the right tool: if your cholesterol is a little high or the pressure starts to jump, it will be easier to convince him to follow healthy menus.
Ma you can also start from a more philosophical reflection, on the need to learn to eat right, respecting the inhabitants of the earth and its ecosystem. Leaving the idea of a diet aimed at simple weight loss, and starting to think about the importance of food in our life, can be a gateway to sharing healthier, balanced and responsible menus. And maybe he himself will become your best supporter. Helping you eliminate junk foods from the pantry and accompanying you in the search for recipes with ok ingredients.
And then there is the case of the partner who thinks only of himself, to fill his belly without taking your needs or desires too seriously. In this case, try to fight his selfishness. Indulge your wishes as well, but let him prepare the food he wants. He wants a high-calorie dish: great. Get him the recipe, and have him juggle the stove. You have a light dish ready for you to counter its mega portion. And then "steal" a forkful. You will have tasted the taste, without bingeing. And if he doesn't want to cook, get organized. Prepare several "overdoses" to freeze at once. Which he will have to defrost, by himself, when he arrives hungry.
Or look for strategies to not always eat meals with him. Often, for those who work, the occasion for meeting at the table is dinner. Good. Book workouts at the gym, two or three times a week, just for that hour. And if he complains about your absence, point out that you are not walking away from him, but from his way of making you suffer. It could even become an opportunity for reflection on your love relationship. In conclusion, get out of "his" kitchen and learn to share other spaces with him. However, an important consideration still remains to be made.
Sometimes "he" is just an excuse not to commit ourselves fully to our decision. The excuse is there, at hand, offered on a plate of ... any food! Be careful, then, not to put all the blame on the partner. Succeed in the intent to lose weight, following a healthy diet also means taking full responsibility for your choices. Including that of not being duped by easy temptations. Whether they come from the pastry shop downstairs, or whether they come from the pantry where he stores his delicacies.
EVERYTHING IS EASIER IN TWO
«For the success of a "slimming regime" the collaboration of the partner is essential»Explains Dr. Carla Lertola, a dietician. «This is why in our Free Diet we have provided ok portions for both her and him. The foods to bring to the table are the same, only the quantities and, consequently, the calories change. But the concept that must pass, on which I continue to insist with the risk of being repetitive, is this: any calorie-controlled menu must first teach how to eat and live well (the loss of extra pounds will be the consequence of new habits, not just food). The boyfriend, husband or partner must understand that if we cook light dishes (however various and tasty) he will feel better too », concludes the expert.