The ideal relationship is one in which both members compromise on the same level and love each other in the same way. However, we do not live in an ideal world and sometimes, for various reasons, one of the two is compromised more than the other; sometimes this happens because one of the two people is engaged in an important project that takes up a lot of time or simply because she is not ready to give her unconditional love. In reality, loving unconditionally is very scary and not everyone is capable of it. One way or another, the truth is that those who love the most usually feel at a disadvantage, especially since we have been taught that to love in this way. way is stupid, that it is not good to show your feelings because the other person could take advantage of it, and that it is right to ask the other to return the same amount of love to us (as if it were a material good that belongs to us) I want to say it without preamble: these are nonsense, beliefs that have been handed down to us and in which we believe blindly without ever stopping to reflect on the question. Those who love more actually have many more advantages and can get many benefits from their feelings.Obviously, we all like to feel loved, I am not referring to the unrequited, but to those relationships in which one of the two gives more than other, but, to some extent, both are compromised in the relationship.How do you manage being the one you love the most?
First of all, it must be borne in mind that love is a wonderful feeling that plunges us into a kind of celestial limbo, which is why it is said that love gives us wings. Therefore, the mere fact of loving in itself implies very positive changes. There is nothing shameful about this.1. Communicate how you feel. People often tense up because they don't want to be the first to say the phrase "I love you". It's a little scary, especially because we fear being rejected, but… isn't it worse to hide what we feel? Showing our feelings to the other person is not only a sign of maturity, but it will also serve to transmit trust and allow him to live the relationship with less fear and doubt. Also, remember that love is expressed not only in words but also through actions.
2. Avoid the give and ask mentality. Erich Fromm said there are different types of love. There is a love in which you give something to get something in return and there is love that you give for the sheer joy of giving, because in this way you feel pleasure without expecting anything in return. This is a wonderful feeling, much better than counting how many times you have said "I love you" and how many times the other has said it to you. Living love in this way is not only easier, it also allows us to grow as a person.
3. Give him some space. Normally someone in love would like to be constantly with the other person, but this sometimes provokes a rejection reaction, as the other perceives that his freedom is being limited. In reality, loving is not absorbing, it is looking for commonalities but in a way that makes both feel free. Love is not addiction, it is not a perfect symbiosis, but rather the union of two people with shared feelings and interests, but who, in the end, remain two people.
- 28Get Personal Growh
