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    Apeing another person resizes ourselves

    Who I am
    Joe Dispenza
    @joedispenza
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    Be yourself, everyone else has already been taken.

    Oscar Wilde

    The idea for this article was born by observing some people I know: one in particular.

    I will try not to mention names, but I will use enough details to make the phenomenon I have witnessed several times well understood.

    Have you ever liked a cartoon, movie or series character so much that you wanted to be him?



    In the past to me yes, many characters are studied really well, also with the help of psychologists and communication specialists.

    Sometimes when this character we like represents quite accurately what we think we want at that moment, a mechanism goes off in our head.

    We like to win easy

    In our head it is as if a reasoning as simple as it is hidden takes place.

    Instead of planning all the actions necessary to achieve the best version of ourselves, such as going to the gym and eating better, we start ape a character.

    What does it mean?

    It means both consciously and unconsciously we step into the role of a character playing a part and changing our behavior.

    To return to the person I mentioned at the beginning of the article, we are talking about a character from the television series Vikings, in particular of Bjorn called "the armor" (which by the way is a historically existed character).


    This person began to mimic Bjorn starting with the simplest and seemingly innocent things.


    The first step was to change your profile name on all social networks inserting Bjorn between the first and last name.

    Subsequently there was a substantial change in the way of dressing, moving and of course a radical change to the haircut.

    But what struck me most of all were not these superficial things but the apparent change of character: I write apparent because the emergence of his real character was evident in many situations.

    From a sociable, witty and often addicted person to jokes he has transformed into a more taciturn individual with behaviors imitating the character of the series.

    Also, every time someone made an appreciation of this seemingly overlap with the character, he was very satisfied and pleased.

    But why do we do it?

    Often the causes of this phenomenon are to be attributed to low self-esteem and above all to a feeling of dissatisfaction with one's life.

    When we are dissatisfied we look for the simplest way, that of the superficial change given by the imitation of another person, as I also wrote in the article where I explained why spiderman has nothing to do with personal growth.

    Often this mimicking a character also happens as a means of escape.


    A escape from a life we ​​don't like or as an escape towards something that we consider more interesting than our own existence.


    In fact, it is not uncommon to mimic completely non-existent and surreal characters like the protagonists of cartoons.

    How to defuse the mechanism

    Obviously, if we are already aware of this mechanism within us, we are already well under way.


    Second, we need to understand why we want to imitate someone else's life and why we want to be him instead of being ourselves.

    A mechanism to be taken into consideration in this case is that ofacceptance.


    I know that imitating a character can make us feel better and can give us that feeling of superiority and self-confidence, but in the long run it is harmful.

    Without considering the fact that in this way we will never be able to develop our personality.

    So however difficult it may be for us, we need to look in the mirror and accept who we are.

    Whether we like it or not, we are what we see in the reflection of the mirror every morning, pretending to be another person is a harmful and aberrant remedy.

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