4 ways to relieve painful emotions

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Louise Hay
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4 ways to relieve painful emotions

Last update: December 21, 2015

We can't help but feel pain. Emotions can be negative or positive; the former are capable of causing us emotional pain that can overwhelm us.

This unpleasant emotional pain is often worse than physical pain. This is why some people try to relieve it by banging a fist against the wall, shouting into a pillow or, in the most extreme cases, resorting to self-harm.



"We can never judge the lives of others, because each one knows only his pain and his sacrifices."

(Paulo Coelho)

If you are an optimistic and positive person, it will be easier for you to overcome this pain compared to those who are negative and pessimistic.

Nonetheless, we hope these four pointers will help you relieve painful emotions.

1) Face the situation

Often, without realizing it, we tend to deny the situation we are experiencing at a given moment.

This is an absolutely normal and acceptable attitude, due to the pain occasionatoci, which we try to avoid and circumvent.

However, if you don't want this pain to turn into a deep wound, you have to recognize what happened, understand why you came to this situation and how you can resolve it (if you can).

Once aware of the situation, take the time to look at things with an intelligent perspective and to be able to accept them. This will help you face reality.

"The art of overcoming great difficulties is studied and acquired with the habit of facing small ones."

(Cristina Trivulzio of Belgioioso)

You must never try to distract yourself from this emotional pain: sooner or later it will return. It is like a wound that, if not treated properly, will start to bleed again or become infected.



2) Let off steam if you need it

Even if you don't want to accept it, venting will be very useful to free you from all that pain that torments you, persecutes you and never ceases to make you suffer.

Practice the following techniques that will help you let off steam:

  • Talk to someone that you really listen to you.
  • Scribble on a piece of paper, even if what you draw doesn't make any sense.
  • Shout at a pillow.
  • Go out to do physical exercise. This will help you rest and clear your mind, which will allow you to cope with pain with a better attitude.
  • Immerse yourself in good music.
  • Break something, such as a sheet of paper. Crumpling can also help you.

All of these techniques can help you let off steam. Surely there are many others, even more effective. Which ones are useful to you? Do you want to share them with us?

3) There is always a silver lining

Even the most negative situations can bring about something positive. For example, if a friend has cheated on us, he will help us better choose our friendships from now on.

Anything that causes emotional pain can help mature. You can learn from a relationship that has ended badly and painfully, from a disappointment, etc.

All these teachings will make you more cautious and mature and will make you understand what you really want in your life and what is better to eliminate.


"Defeat has something positive in it, it is never definitive"

(Jose Saramango)

Negative experiences exist so that you can learn from them and become the people you really want to be. If you treasure the lessons learned from negative experiences, you will advance in a positive way throughout your life.


4) Don't let the pain affect you

This is just a phase that everyone must go through, and there will be others that are equally difficult. We are emotional beings who have to overcome many painful situations. Won't you give up?


You are strong and you have the power to deal with this pain by learning from it and feeding on all the positive things it can offer you.

Think of pain as a source of motivation and strength that you must feel and assimilate to strengthen and mature.

Don't allow the pain to overwhelm you and to sink into it. You have the strength to overcome this difficult moment which, sooner or later, will pass.

"Pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice"

(Buddha Gautama)

Always look for someone who is willing to listen to you, someone you trust. Problems are easier to bear when they are shared and seen more clearly.

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