Why are some people more successful than others? Why do some achieve most of their goals and others don't? In addition to pure talent, which is different in each of us, the other key to living the life we want and achieving our goals is the winning mentality.
What is the winning mentality?
“Winners in life constantly think in terms of 'I can', 'I want' and 'I am'. Losers, on the other hand, focus their thoughts on what they should have done or what they didn't do, ”according to Denis Waitley. Although speaking in terms of "winners" and "losers" is a bit simplistic, it is true that some people are satisfied with their lives while others are deeply unhappy.
The winning mindset arises from a thought pattern focused on proactivity and a positive and confident attitude towards life. People with a winning mindset see opportunities where others see only obstacles and have enough self-confidence to get what they want.
The winning mentality is to get what you want, whether it is becoming a manager of a multinational recognized by all or cultivating a small organic garden in a small provincial town. The winning mentality does not refer to social recognition but to the level of satisfaction we achieve in our life, a satisfaction that comes from having achieved the goals we have set ourselves, whatever they are.
The winning mentality is not measured in quantitative terms but in meaning. It is not about how far we have come by social standards, but how far we have come by our standards. It is not a label that society gives us, but an attitude towards life. What we earn is not status or recognition, but personal satisfaction and growth. It is not about feeling something to others but to ourselves. The "reward" does not come from society, but from personal satisfaction.
The characteristics of people with a positive and winning mentality
People who have a positive and winning mindset share a number of traits and characteristics that help them succeed in their projects:
• They know how to appreciate the positive in the negative, looking for opportunities where others perceive only obstacles
• They take problems as challenges to challenge themselves rather than discourage them
• They are not afraid of failure, they continually step out of their comfort zone and learn from their mistakes
• They are persistent and have the ability to stay motivated along the way, so they don't lose heart
• They develop a proactive attitude towards problems, preferring to focus on finding solutions rather than complaining about the damage suffered
• They have full confidence in their abilities and are aware of their potential, developing a positive image of themselves
• They put passion into what they do, develop genuine interests, and immerse themselves fully in achieving their goals
3 practical actions to develop a winning mentality
1. Overcoming the negativity bias
We all have a negativity bias. This bias helps us survive by making our brains fixate on negative experiences rather than positive ones. But if we get stuck in the prejudice of negativity, we are likely to develop a losing mindset, becoming people who are afraid to take risks and explore new possibilities.
Therefore, the first step in developing a winning mindset is to overcome that negative bias. As a general rule, five positive thoughts are needed to compensate for one negative thought. Therefore, if we realize that we are looking at the world through a pessimistic lens, we must orient our thinking by developing a more optimistic perspective.
We can ask ourselves: what opportunities do I not see? What positive aspects does this situation include? What personal strengths will help me overcome this obstacle? What can I do to turn the situation around in my favor? Is it an opportunity to start over or see things differently?
2. Establish meaningful goals and objectives
The winning mindset is a focused mind. We can't do great things if we don't know what we want in life and just be like leaves blowing in the wind. People with a winning mindset know what they want and try with all their strength, energy and resources.
In this sense, the psychologists of the University of Maryland conducted a very interesting experiment in which they assigned three objectives with different degrees of complexity to three groups of university students. A fourth group was simply asked to "do what they can".
Then each participant had to list 4, 7 or 12 uses for everyday objects in one minute. Interestingly, the harder the goal, the better the performance. The difficulty of the objectives does not make us give up, but it pushes us to try harder. In fact, the fourth group who were simply told to do what they could fared worse.
These psychologists concluded that “when people try to do what they can, they simply don't do their best. This type of 'goal' lacks an external referent and is therefore idiosyncratically defined. This allows for a wide range of acceptable levels of performance, which is not the case when a goal is specified. "
So, if we want to develop a winning mindset and see results, we better set ourselves ambitious goals. However, we also need to make sure these goals are meaningful because that will ensure that we will stay motivated until they are achieved. It is also important that they are strategic, achievable and time-limited goals as in this way we will avoid getting caught up in goals that we cannot achieve, wasting time and resources.
3. Get out of your comfort zone and do what makes you uncomfortable
Maintaining a winning mindset makes no sense unless accompanied by action. And this inevitably leads us out of the comfort zone and sometimes even into the panic zone. To do great things that truly change our lives, we need to face our biggest fears.
It means that we must be willing to deal with situations that make us uncomfortable. When we step into that unfamiliar ground we begin to test our strength, gain experience, and become more resilient people. Our comfort zone will not only become wider, but we will develop greater confidence in our abilities to cope with life's problems and difficulties.
When we do what we fear or make us uncomfortable, it loses its emotional hold on us. We will realize that they were only setbacks on the way. Therefore, it is important that at least once a day we face those little things that make us uncomfortable and that we avoid. The winning mentality is strengthened by overcoming what scares us, to stop being afraid of failure.